Page 60 of A Subtle Scar
“When humans began doing away with horses even though they had been with them for such a long time, the change fascinated me as did the resulting inventions: cars, trains, airplanes, eventually. People used to cherish their horses, and soon, they began to cherish the other things. You know how people love their cars and give them names?”
“Sure,” I said. It was silly, but I was very guilty of using “she” for my car, come to think of it.
Charon nodded. “That made me wonder about how human adoration can shift to something inanimate. If you had asked me early on, I would have told you that I didn’t think horses would ever fully vanish from big cities but look outside.” He indicated the road, cars parking on either side. I didn’t even see bicyclists, let alone anyone on horseback. “In my thinking, humans adored the animals for their presence and will as much as for the convenience in travel and work they brought. I was wrong. It made me wonder whether I truly understood humans as well as I’d always prided myself on, but then public transport became widespread, and it gave me an opportunity to talk to people. Understand them better.”
“Are you for real?” Deacon said from the back seat.
“Very much,” Charon said. “I have also learned to disregard rude people on public transport. Unless they do not offer up their seat for the elderly. That I will not abide.”
I pulled into the morgue’s parking lot, neatly backed into a spot, and wondered whether I had underestimated Charon. And whether what I knew about immortals wasn’t fundamentally flawed to begin with.
Everyone got out, Deacon still pissed off, Charon not really giving a fuck as far as I could tell.
“You two head inside,” I said. “I’ll just be a minute.”
Charon cocked his head. “Is everything well?”
“Yeah. Just give me a minute.”
He looked uncertain and didn’t move from the spot even as Deacon stoically made his way into the building. After a little while, Charon gave a curt nod and followed Deacon.
I pulled out my phone and stared at it for about as long as Charon had at me. When I woke the screen, things got easier because Lionel had in fact left me a message. It was a simpleHow’s it going?but it gave me an excuse for calling him, if a thin one.
Lionel picked up fast. “Sooo?” he asked. “I mean, I heard things. But no details; sooo?”
My eyebrows went up. “Can you tell me what exactly it was you heard?”
“Oh, Lucy and I were in town. Looking at houses, long story. Anyway, he took a call, and I got him to tell me that we’d be going on a double-and-a-half date unless your two boyfriends fail utterly in being halfway capable death gods by not seducing you fully. Which I think is actually a quote.”
“What?” My eyebrows felt glued to my hairline. I kicked a small rock underneath my car, then began pacing, then stopped. I didn’t really pace. It made me look like I didn’t know what I was doing.
“Well, they called him. And asked about, you know. How to woo a human, as if Lucy knew the first thing about that.” He whispered that last bit. “Did you know, he left a fucking muffin on my fucking desk for four fucking years for my birthday and never told me it was him leaving them? I thought Christine had done that. Lucy justassumedI’d figure out it was him somehow. Anyway. Welcome to the club. If there is a club. Well, there is. I can give you a little bit of advice, but Sephy has the best tips, and if you want to handle two alpha gods, you’ll need all the help you can get.”
I took the phone off my ear to check the caller ID because all of this was beginning to feel very surreal. It was as if I’d stepped through a portal at some point and had now landed in a reality in which I had agreed to being in a relationship with anyone. And everything around me seemed to want to convince me that it was so.
“I just thought it was a one-night stand,” I said, the phone back against my ear. Unprofessional oversharing, yes, but I was out of my depth.
There was a long silence on the other end. Then Lionel said, “Oh. I don’t think they are on the same page with you there. And…take it from someone who knows: they aren’t going to get on the same page with you now. Or ever.” Then, there was a noise, and Lionel’s voice sounded less echoey, but he was whispering again. For some reason, I imagined him hiding in a closet. “Look, I…I’m not good at relationship advice, okay? Really not good, but from what I’ve seen, you’ll be cherished. Cosseted. Just…loved. Beyond all reason and without reservations. I mean, you know I don’t have family, or none I want to think about. I was scared Lucy would eventually leave me, but I don’t think immortals are built that way. They are so in it for the long haul, you know? Sorry, I’ve been rambling.”
I swallowed and dug deep for my professional voice. “No, that’s okay. Thank you, and have a good time house shopping.”
There was noise in the background. “Babe, what are you doing in the closet? Did you want to play hide and seek?” I heard Lucifer’s voice, and the Devil sounded very excited about it, hopeful even.
I hung up before they could get into it and stuffed my phone into my pocket. Lionel wasn’t going to be any help, clearly, so I’d have to take care of this myself. Two immortals wouldn’t be the first people I’d have to let down gently. I’d let them finish this case with me, and then, I’d sit them down and have The Talk with them. If Charon was actually interested in understanding humans like he said, he’d get that. He’d understand. I wasn’tfora relationship, and I couldn’t do it. They’d get it. Maybe we could do a goodbye fuck, something I’d not been averse to before, during other Talks.
It would be fine. They would understand. They were not cruel, capricious megalomaniacs like the literature made them out to be, and I could handle them.
With that knowledge—with that realization—I felt more grounded than I had in the last twenty-four hours. I wasn’t looking forward to seeing whether the ME had been able to reconstruct the subway body’s jaw, but the optimism still put a spring in my step.
Everything would be fine, and once I was done with this case, I would go back to being single. My vacation would be over, and I’d be able to go into the office every morning and spend a productive day there. My life would be making sense again.
Chapter Sixteen
Itmadenosensewhy I was not allowed to stuff evil humans into burlap sacks, but if our boyfriend demanded it, then I had to do it, especially since things still felt like they hadn’t really settled yet between us.
I walked along the sidewalk next to the street where the first human girl had been tossed out of a van. That had happened on the Devil’s necromancer’s birthday, incidentally, and I wondered whether there was a connection. But Lucy had trained his boyfriend much too well, and I didn’t think the demigod was friends with any unsavory types who’d want to present him a fresh corpse.
I chuckled. “Not a female corpse, anyway.”
