Page 39 of Found By You
She nodded. “I mean, I might not be the best to ask about what is normal at the moment…”
I smiled for the first time.
She smiled back.
It was … amazing, talking with this woman and having her be there for me.
“It’s going to be okay, I promise.”
Our eyes held and so many feelings rushed through me. She frowned. “It seems like you do have unresolved feelings for her.”
Annoyed, I stood. Then paced again. “I don’t. I mean, I guess I do. She acts like I should just kiss her back and we can move on with our relationship. I guess what infuriates me is she acts like she doesn’t owe me some … apology.” I yearned for a punching bag. I yearned for a bad guy to chase down and beat the crap out of.
“It’s frustrating when you don’t have answers.”
I stopped pacing and met her gaze again. I sighed. “I guess you know that.”
She nodded. “I do.”
I let out a sardonic laugh. “Though not remembering could be nice. Sometimes.”
She nodded. “True.”
I sat again. “Thank you.”
She frowned. “For what?”
“For talking it through with me.”
She shook her head. “You talked, I listened.”
“Thank you for that.”
Her eyebrow went up. “Of course.” She paused. “But it seems like you would have a lot of people to talk things through with you.”
I nodded. “My family, yes, when I want them to. But it’s hard too because they pretty much hate Rose at this point.”
“How do you feel about her?”
Her question took me aback for a second and I had to choose my words carefully.
“What?”
I felt nervous, but I pushed through it. “This is probably going to come out all wrong, but the last couple of days have been really nice.”
The side of her lip turned up. “Really?”
“Yes, it’s been so nice to talk to you, laugh with you, and see things through new eyes. I don’t know. I mean, I’m probably saying way too much. But you’re always asking questions like, ‘Why isn’t someone here? Why hasn’t someone come for me, and do I have a husband or a boyfriend?’ And every time you do, I feel scared that someonewillcome for you, that you will be married, and maybe I’ll never get a shot with you.”
The moment went … quiet.
Even the crickets had gone quiet, as if nature itself was waiting to see what would happen next.
I turned away from her searching gaze. “I don’t know what I’m saying. My head’s not on straight.” I immediately regretted spilling all of that to her. “I shouldn’t have said that.” I stood and moved toward the house. “Here, let’s just go back and forget that conversation.”
“Wait, McCrae.”
I kept walking.
