Page 126 of In Between Darkness
I step timidly towards him again and try to meet his gaze, but his eyes stay stuck on the floor.
“I can’t, Asha.” His face contorts at war with his thoughts, but I still tread carefully towards him. “I didn’t want to walk through this door, but they ordered me to, and I couldn’t stop myself.” His voice breaks, and his fists are closed so tightly his fingernails dig into the soft of his palm.
I don’t believe him; he can fight this.
“Well, I’m not giving up on you.” I straighten my spine and continue towards him.
“I SAID GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME, ASHA!” he screams, making me flinch as rage erupts out of him. “They’re gonna make me kill you… You have to kill me first.”
His eyes are full of sorrow. “Please… promise me you’ll kill me if you get the chance.” A tear rolls slowly down his cheek, and I nod my head to ease his sorrows. But there is no way in hell I am killing that boy.
“Enough of this!” Darryn’s voice seeps through the intercom, lingering in the air between us, trapped within these four walls, just as we are.
“Kill her!”
Chapter Fifty
His movements are mechanical, like a robot, always two steps ahead of mine. He glares at me with eyes that are not his own, reflecting a version of myself I do not recognise. Each step he takes towards me, there is a battle against his own will, his muscles coil with a darker energy he cannot control. I watch his conscience try to breathe rationality into his decisions, but this metamorphosis is unforgiving and does not give it the oxygen it needs to survive.
“Ryder, I know you’re in there.” I try to reason with him, backing away from his towering frame.
His face contorts as he fights to speak, to warn me, but the words are trapped behind a wall of forced obedience.
“Ryder, you’re stronger than this.”
He does not reply, but his anger speaks for him through pursed lips and gritted teeth, and his steps do not hesitate. His hands, which once held me with tenderness, are now clenched tightly into fists, drawn towards me by an invisible force.
I watched him try to fight the urge to rip my head off. He screamed and begged me to kill him, but I couldn’t do it… and now he has lost the fight.
I try to keep my distance, to create space between us. But this room is slowly squeezing the life out of me; the walls are like a vice, closing in on me. He lunges again, his knuckles white with tension, aiming punches at me with force and purpose. I duck and dodge and plaster myself on the far side of thewall. I don’t want to hurt him. The man who made me fall for him has become a weapon against me. My heart shatters with every twitch of his tormented face, every punch intended to crush my skull. I know he does not mean it, but it still hurts, nevertheless. My heart thumps in my chest as his being shifts, his shadows seeping out of his skin like black smoke. He glares at me with rage, and I do not recognise him anymore. With every involuntary movement, he is getting stronger and gunning with more force, losing the fight within himself. I gulp. I know the power he possesses, and now it’s twisted and aimed at me, a grim reality settles in my stomach. To survive, I have to fight back.
“Ryder, this isn’t you… You have to fight it.” The words escape my lips but seep through the cracks of his mind, never quite reaching him.
“WAKE UP!” I scream at him, hope clinging to the tip of my tongue.
“Please.” I sob in a desperate plea to the man trapped within, tears blurring my vision, but his presence is unwavering, each step a relentless stride closer to me.
I armour myself behind the iron chair bolted into the ground and plead with him again - “Ryder! WAKE UP!”
But my words are snuffed out by the shadows.
Ryder stands, his deep purple eyes piercing into mine as hordes of shadows take on tentacle-like forms, spewing from his back, and orbs of light rotate around his being, breaking up the shadows. The world slows, and a lump forms in my throat. Ryder’s gone, and he’s not coming back anytime soon.
‘Asha, you have to fight!’Oriah’s voice combats the walls of my mind.‘He is not a true Star. You have the ability to win this.’
“I won’t kill him!” I fight back at the voice in my mind. “I won’t let them win.”
‘Don’t make me regret choosing you!’
The iron chair flings out of its bolts and crashes against the wall. The shadows lob balls of light at me like bullets. They whiz through the air fast, ricocheting off the walls. I try to duck and dodge and Influence them back at him, but one hits me. I wince as the feeling of a hot iron hammer to the chest takes the wind out of me. I cough and splutter, the smell of burning flesh and cotton from my clothes sickening my senses.
‘Fight back!’Oriah now pleads to me with desperation.‘He might have light and dark, but he won’t have access to a portal. Use that to your advantage.’
I nod hesitantly, registering her words, unbending my posture and holding my chest. I feel stronger now, but I am conscious of the blood I have already lost. I use my portal to throw myself behind him and jam my elbow into his collarbone, before portalling back towards the other side of the room. He is taken aback by this, clutching at his shoulder briefly before narrowing his eyes at me again. The attack definitely weakened him for a second. I do the same again and again, portalling close and jabbing him in the stomach, jaw and ribcage. And then, his pressure points. He flinches back with each hit, and my heart heavies. He screams in frustration and summons his shadows again to shield his body. Dammit, I cannot portal through the shadows. The shadows enlarge his already large frame, they stick to him like armour, spidering in and out like they are alive. A spider’s leg reaches through the air and swipes my feet from beneath me. I land on the marble floor with a thud and shuffle my way closer to the wall. His presence looms over me, his eyes staring into mine as his shadows reach for me. I shuffle further back until I feel the cold wall press against my warm back.
In this moment, I conjure shadows of my own to shield me from his.
‘No two shadows are the same; theydo not mix.’ I remember his words the night he saved my life, the night that changedeverything. His face tenses as our shadow armour repels one another. He stands inches away from me, our shadows not letting us touch. I find myself getting lost in his features the way I used to, his sharp jawline, his dark eyes and black silky hair, the slight dust of freckles on the bridge of his nose. He is still him. He protected me from Alex and helped me save River. I have to help him. I owe him that much.
