Page 39 of Dahlias, Sapphires, and Cool Autumn Dusk
“Hey,” he said as he tossed his bag on the kitchen counter. “Well, this is going to get old. Twice a week with all day classes feels like a lot, but at least I was interested and…” His voice trailed off. “You all look a little strung out. What did I miss?”
Phoenix leaned against the door frame of his room, his glazed eyes proving my suspicions about how he’d spent his hour.
“Let’s just get to it. We knew you wouldn’t like it, so we did it before you got home.” He explained our exploits before Barrett even managed to sit down. By the time he finished, he had sunk into one of the chairs next to me.
Silence permeated the room, a gaping hole filled with our confessions. Maybe none of us really processed all of it, or maybe it was just me, but somehow telling Barrett about it made everything seem more stupid.
He rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know what bothers me more, the fact that you got stuck in a closet and almost got caught or that you did it when you knew I couldn’t even try to talk you out of it.” He shook his head. “Actually, what bothers me more is that Kit told you to do it. Let me tell you something, had I been here, you wouldn’t have gone, which he knew.”
Barrett headed to the kitchen then came back with a beer, which he drained in one long pull from the bottle. Then he added, “Not to mention I could have helped you. If I was there, we would’ve known she wasn’t coming back, because I would have confirmed her arrival at the event. I could help you, too. I’m not just some stick in the mud.”
He practically shouted the words, his temper clearly getting the best of him. Guilt hit me, as he likely intended, but I rose and put my arms around him. “I guess maybe we knew that yourgood sense would prevail. Despite that, we wanted to go get the folder.”
He hugged me back. “Don’t leave me out of your plans in the future.” He kissed my hair. “What did the birth certificate say, anyway? I’m honestly curious where you were born.”
I shook my head. “I handed the file to Daniel without looking at it in some kind of blind panic. It would have taken two seconds to look, so I’m feeling pretty stupid right now.”
“You got a file with your name on it then, right? We’ll at least know soon what was in it, but if we need to break in to get your birth certificate again because it’s not in that file, I’m going, too.” He released me, and gave me a final warning stare. “Got it?”
Jeremy nodded, but he also grinned. “I still can’t believe we hid in a closet.”
It really was the strangest day.
The guysall slept around me, Jeremy on one side, Phoenix on the other. Barrett sprawled over his mattress, one hand off to the side while Julian lay on his back, eyes closed, mouth open. Phoenix snored with the twins, the way he did when he was exhausted.Probably from staying at Joe’s last night.
The Lents could sleep through stress, but I couldn’t. I didn’t mind, since I would probably only find nightmares if I managed sleep in my current mood.
As quietly as I could, I snuck out of the bedroom, closing the door behind me. I could read Dina’s journals to pass the hours until dawn. I knew myself well enough to know that if I started working on thePoor Relation,I would never get to sleep.
Instead, I opened her journal, excited to venture back into the past with her again. When last I read, she had visitedLouisiana and was convinced something was amiss with the other side of the lake. Or the second lake? Why did they refer to two lakes as one? It was confusing to me.
DECEMBER 6TH1966
Hello to myself,
I am sure only I will ever read this, so I’m talking to myself again. Maybe someday, I’ll be senile and not remember all of this, so it will be good that I recorded the events. Or maybe I just need something to do while they all go fishing, since I really don’t want to spend any more time talking to their mother today.
It isn’t that she’s overtly hostile or anything, but I know she doesn’t like me. I think she thinks I’m the reason they’re planning to head back to Manhattan. They don’t see it, but that’s fine. I do.
The guys are different here. In some ways, they’re more relaxed. In other ways, I miss New York. Nathaniel doesn’t laugh as much here, I’ve noticed. Victor is always kicking the dirt in front of him, as if the soil itself offends him.
Ed is always quiet, but he is so much quieter here. Only Robert seems the same.
So…I asked Robert to take me back to the other side of the lake.
He ran his hand through my hair when I asked. “Why? Why do you even want to go?”
I took his hands in mine. “Because I can tell you all don’t want me to go, which means I need to see it. You didn’t just leave here because you wanted to open a store, and I know it. You left here because there is something you don’t like, which makes menervous. I’m ready to commit to our relationship, ready to say let’s give it a try, but I can’t do it if you’re hiding things from me. That’s unfair to me.”
He nodded, agreeing easily to my logic. Sweet Robert. “You’re right.”
We got into the car together and drove to the other side, and he stopped and parked. It was foggy, so I needed a sweater, but that was actually kind of nice after the heat of the day. We talked as we strolled, the night still around us, cricket song leading us as easily as the fireflies. Eventually, we stopped in front of a boarded-up house, and his hand tightened around mine.
“We used to live there.”
I was shocked, reconsidering the structure I considered ramshackle at best. I thought they spent their whole lives in their beautiful white house, and had no clue they came from humbler roots. “When?”
“Back when I was born.” Robert stood right next to me, but his gaze never seemed so distant before. “You’ve noticed there are two sides of this place—the wealthy and the not wealthy. We lived on this wrong side of the lake. Eventually, my fathers made a lot of money, becoming the wealthiest family here. We moved across the lake when I was ten, but we weren’t so wonderfully accepted despite having the money to be among them. Sure, everyone plays nice now, but we were too much of a reminder that things over here aren’t always so nice.”
