Page 76 of Dahlias, Sapphires, and Cool Autumn Dusk
He didn’t lie, since it was their birthday. They said what they wanted from me was one-on-one time. Their plan? I would stay in bed to watch movies with Jules all day then go out with Jeremy in the evening. That would be after their family dinner, but nobody bothered to fill me in on the specifics of what they considered that to mean.
I also had to make a cake.
I didn’t know how to respond to them fighting for my time, so I got tense, because anxiety was my coping mechanism. I decided to ask Dina, since she had experience being an outsider then marrying into a close-knit group of brothers.
For the moment, I should at least say something. “When you get like this over me, it makes me nervous inside. I worry I’m not giving you sufficient attention, and things will explode. Regardless, the only logical solution will be to get rid of me.”
Only a few weeks ago, I wouldn’t have found the courage to admit it to them, but I wasn’t sure it meant an improvement that I did.
I rushed to add, “I know you’ll say it’s not true, that you would never, but I needed to tell you how I feel. You guys can believe what you want, okay?”
Julian moved to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Phoenix. “You already know what we will say? You just told us you do, and I never knew you were psychic. It must come in handy. Meanwhile, Phoenix and I have been swiping at each other verbally since we were old enough to talk. He’s the baby who made me give up my pacifier.”
He scrunched up his face at his brother, nudging him with his shoulder. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You were born, and they decided I was too old for a pacifier. At a mere thirteen months of age, yet they ripped it away. . .because of you.”
Phoenix stared in bafflement at Julian. “You can’t possibly remember that.”
“No, but Granny told me about it.” He smiled. “She wanted to make sure I didn’t forget, so I could hold my resentment forever.”
Phoenix actually laughed then poured Julian a cup of coffee.
I took a deep breath, because somehow, it all still worked.
19
“How’s the baking going?” Barrett whispered in my ear. I almost jumped out of my skin. He’d been at school, one of his late nights, so I was alone in the kitchen making a homemade cake for the twins. Or trying. It was ridiculous. They had a Michelin starred chef cook their birthday dinner before, and with my lack of experience, I was attempting to follow a recipe from a cookbook. It likely would be a disaster.
I glanced at their older brother, who I adored so much, and confessed, “This may not be my thing.”
“Can I help?” He squeezed me from behind, nuzzling into my neck, and I decided I enjoyed his brand of assistance. He so rarely showed easy affection. I turned in his arms to note his loose muscles and easy expression..totally relaxed.
“Good day?” I asked.
“Good now.”
He hoisted me up onto the counter next to the bowl where I was trying to make icing. I scooped some of the chocolate out of the bowl onto my finger and offered it to him with a wink. “Want to taste?”
Holding eye contact the whole time, he bent over and licked it off my finger, wrapping his tongue around the digit and sizzling my nerve endings. I gasped, heat rising in my body as my heartbeat raced. I wanted him. . .and them. When should I tell them we could try more than just kissing?
I figured if I got brave enough to say it aloud, it meant I would be brave enough to do it.
I dipped my finger back into the bowl, reveling in his reaction. He did it again, closing his eyes and moaning as he laved my finger and then bit the end.
Practically transfixed, I watched him with hot cheeks. The twins were at water polo—I had skipped their game to bake—and Phoenix was at Joe’s, leaving us utterly alone in the apartment. For some reason, the knowledge we were alone made me brave, so I took what I needed from him.
I wrapped my arms around him and drew him closer to me, pulling him between my legs so his hardness bumped up against me. Without hesitating, I kissed him, my lips hungry for his mouth and my tongue bold.
He responded with equal enthusiasm, pushing me back at first, but when he tried to pull away to give us time to breathe, I didn’t let him. Instead, I twined my legs around his waist and ground up against him. Barrett took the hint.
He kissed andkissedme, his hand fondling my breast until I gasped for him. His whiskers scraped at my cheek and neck as he dragged open mouthed kisses over my skin until I sizzled with heat for him.
Barrett picked me up and carried me over to the couch. Once he lay on top of me, he picked up where he had left off. As he dragged my shirt lower, revealing my shoulder blades, I couldn’t get enough of him.
I kissed him, my mouth hungry for whatever tastes I could find. I memorized his flavor, knowing I would be addicted to it.He tugged on my shirt and then stopped, meeting my gaze with concern. “This okay?”
I nodded. “Yes, I want your hands on me.”
