Page 31 of A Secret Infatuation
“And I am not insensible of that, nor is my father. However, I beg you will leave my father out of this matter, for he is not in any way connected with it.” Felix attempted to think how he might convince the baron and decided on the truth. “I know Admiral Mowbray, and he won’t go against his principles on this.”
Lord Chawleigh stared at him for a long moment. “Then approach someone else in the Admiralty.”
Felix slowly shook his head. “I truly do not wish to disoblige you, but I know no one else. I have no connections there apart from the admiral.” He knew Mr. Edwards, but he was only the private secretary to the admiral, besides sharing the same convictions for reform.
Lord Chawleigh pressed his fingers together and took a weighted moment before replying. “I must express how disappointed I am in this outcome. I suggest you discover if there might be some other way to make this appointment happen. I shall expect to hear a more positive response soon.” He got to his feet.
Knowing he was at an impasse, Felix stood. It was cowardly, perhaps, but he had no more opposition inside of him after his interview with Robert. There were too many obstacles to overcome, and he was unable to push back as decidedly as he should. He merely nodded, then bowed and took his leave.
“I wish you good day, my lord.”
As he left the baron’s residence, he let his mind dwell again on whether he could possibly approach the admiral with such a request. He turned the question over, but no matter how he looked at it, he knew that it was simply impossible. One did not throw one’s principles away at the slightest pressure, and the admiral would not do it.
Felix must not either—he would have to stand firm. He just wished there was not so much at stake.
Chapter 14
Sophia sat quietly in the drawing room working on a pretty piece of embroidery she hoped to do something special with. She would set it aside for her wedding trousseau, except that she had a secret fear she might never marry. The only thing she added to with any regularity was her memento book, which now had pressed flower petals that had been in a vase the day he had come to call, and the beribboned accessory he retrieved that she never did sew back on her bonnet. The libretto from the opera had also gone in the book, although it carried painful memories along with the happier ones.
Marie and Camilla sat with her, Marie engaged in untangling a mass of colored threads and Camilla tapping her fingers on the armrest of her chair. The subdued atmosphere was partially owing to Marie’s depressed spirits. She had explained them away by saying she had not had enough sleep.
Sophia was filled with sympathy for her. Her affection for her friend remained undimmed, even though it had been painful to watch her walking with Mr. Harwood and conversing in such intimate posture. It was all her own fault for not having told Marie of her interest in Mr. Harwood from the beginning, and now it was too late. It would be impossible to tell her anything now when her friend had expressed her own interest first. Because of her secret, a distance seemed to have sprung up between them that had never been there before. And besides, as often happened when she was not directly in Mr. Harwood’s company, she convinced herself that there was every reason he would choose Marie over her.
At least that was what she had thought until the picnic. But there, he had admitted to watching her, and his eyes had been alive with warmth when he had said it. His statement had surprised her so greatly, she was not sure what she would have said had she been allowed to finish her sentence. But surely, he would not say such a thing if he was not interested? His revelation left her more confused now than ever.
Camilla finally stopped drumming her fingers and picked up her tea. The cake on her plate was only half-eaten. “Evo should be here soon.”
They had been waiting for their younger brother to come, now that he was on school holiday. He was to spend two weeks with them, and Sophia could not wait to see him.
“I shall be glad to have a glimpse of him, too, for I am sure he is much grown,” Marie offered. “But then I shall leave you to your family. I should not wish to impose.”
“You will not impose,” Sophia protested.
“You are generous to say so, but it is best that you be allowed a private family dinner to catch up on everything. Besides, Papa has invited Mr. Edwards this evening for dinner. And he brings news that Papa thinks will interest me. He is very droll and well-connected,” Marie said dully, quelling any hopes Sophia might have that she would fall for him instead.
“I am sure it will be a very pleasant evening,” she answered cautiously.
Tilly entered the room carrying a tray of paper cuttings and scissors. She sat on one of the chairs and placed them on the table, picking up one she had cut into the shape of a flower.
“What’s that, Tilly?” Sophia leaned forward and picked up another sample of her cutting. “How pretty! You are skilled at this delicate work.”
“Miss Cross showed me how to make the extra layers. She learned it from her sister on her last visit.” She smiled at Sophia. “It’s to decorate the table for Evo’s return. I have made something else, as well, as a surprise.”
“I am sure his spirits will be lifted by the paper flowers,” Camilla said gravely. Sophia was sure she was teasing, but there was no malice in her tone so she refrained from comment.
“You appear to have ended on good terms with Mr. Grantly when last I saw you at the picnic,” Marie said. She had been unnaturally quiet on their return that day and made few observations on the afternoon. “Has he redeemed himself?”
“I believe I understand him a little better. He told me he does not converse well with ladies.” Camilla paused, adding with a smile, “So I encouraged him to go on ignoring me, if that will make him feel better.”
Marie and Sophia laughed. “I would protest that you did no such thing,” Sophia said, “except for the fact that I am sure you did.”
Camilla chuckled. “He does have some surprises in him, however, for he admitted—quite by accident—to developing a subscription program for a local school so that the village children might have literacy. Perhaps you ought to see if he is willing to subscribe to the naval asylum, Sophia.”
She knew from her sister’s tone that she was teasing, but she repressed a shudder at the thought of approaching someone so intimidating. “I dare not approach a gentleman on such a matter—especially one who does not enjoy conversing with ladies.”
“I will send Regina Edwards to him,” Marie said with a laugh. “She is not afraid of anyone.”
A familiar rap sounded on the front door, and Sophia stood in anticipation.
