Page 7 of Velvet Thorns
There are a million reasons screaming at me not to go back.
Ava
Brandon
Cassie
Even that dickflap Greg, who couldn’t string a full sentence together unless it involved calling me a freak or asking if I’d washed that week.
I’m not the same girl I was when I left. But even with all the time and distance, and all the fucking therapy, there’s still one reason that makes my chest feel like it’s caving in every time I think about going home.
Phoenix Cassidy.
Best friend.
First love.
First heartbreak.
Worst enemy disguised as everything I ever wanted.
I hate him. I hate the sound of his name and the way he stillappears in my dreams, uninvited yet never unwelcome enough for me to forget.
I think about that day behind the bleachers more often than I want to admit. God, I was already breaking then. I’d been unraveling under the weight of every bad thing in my life, and I just needed to feel like he was there, even if it wasn’t real. But then he actually showed up as if the ache in my chest had summoned him. He found me, and for a moment, he looked at me like I was something he wanted, something he needed, and when he kissed me, I believed it. I let myself fall into the lie and drown in the illusion that maybe I still mattered to him.
But just as quickly, he shattered everything.
He turned that moment into something cruel, and that was the last time I saw him.
I finished out the year holed up in that shitty trailer, counting down the days until I could disappear. My scholarship was my escape, and when I left, I never looked back.
Now I have enough money to feel secure for the first time in my life. I’ve learned to hold my own in rooms where I used to feel invisible, and I’m finally the woman I always hoped I could become. I built this life from the ashes of my old one and made damn sure no one would ever get close enough again to hurt me the way he did. But after all this time, I still can’t get Phoenix out of my head.
I think about him more than I’ll ever admit.
I wonder where he is, if there’s a wife out there wearing his ring, if there are kids who walk around with his smile.
Of course there are.
Of course he’s given someone else the kind of care he once poured into me. The difference is, she gets to keep it.
After I drag myself out of bed and take a shower, the doorbell rings. I check the camera, and it’s the bane of my existence—otherwiseknown as the best friend I wish I’d had back in high school, when I actually needed someone in my corner.
You had a best friend. He fucked you over.
That intrusive bitch in my head never misses her cue.
Lianna breezes in like a storm in heels the second I open the door. “Good morning, you bad bitch. Here, hydrate before you traumatize a mirror.” She shoves my favorite coffee into my hand before I can even open my mouth to tell her to fuck right off.
“Thanks, that’s just what I needed to hear. Truly uplifting.”
She’s already stomping through my apartment like she owns the place, her designer purse tossed onto the kitchen island as she heads for the fridge. She pops it open, rifles through it, and grabs a bottle of water.
Her jet-black hair is pulled back into a sleek ponytail, looking like the poster girl for someone who’s got their life together. However, she’s batshit crazy, impulsive, and emotionally unhinged, even on her best days. She is, without question, the most irrational human being I’ve ever had the misfortune of loving like a sister.
“What are you doing here? I thought you had a date last night.”
“I did,” Lianna says, kicking off her heels and settling herself against the kitchen island.
