Page 72 of Rival
Nodding, I huff out a laugh. Instead of responding to that, I find myself asking, “Are you seeing someone new now?”
“What?” She stills her movements and seems surprised by my question.
Reaching to the backseat, I grab a few shirts I’ve had lying around and hand one to her. We both wipe the water away as I say, “You said you got yourself into another situation when I asked about the guy. I’m assuming that situation is someone new.”
With a sigh, she drops my shirt into her lap and looks down. “I think so. I don’t even know. I feel crazy because I went from never even flirting with someone before to what I told you the other day, andnow…”
She trails off and I lift her chin, so she’ll look at me. “Now?”
“Now I’ve started something with someone, but I don’t think it’s anything other than, well,that.”
Something uneasy swells inside of my chest, and I find myself getting angry. Not at her, but at myself for, yet again, trying to give her some time. “Thatbeing you’re fucking someone else now?”
“Jaxon, are you,” she starts to ask, then inhales sharply. “Are you angry with me?”
“No, sweetheart,” I rush to say. “No, I’m pissed at myself.”
The slight fear she had changes to confusion. “Why in the world would you be upset with yourself?”
My laugh is so self-deprecating that she shifts closer with worry. “I’ll get into that in a second, but I got to know Edith. Is that what you were about to tell me? That you’re seeing someone?”
“I wouldn’t say I’m seeing him,” she mumbles. With hunched shoulders, rubs at her cheek and sighs. “I think I started one of those things where you are with someone just as friends because it just happens. Like, maybe convenience, I suppose. He told me when I asked what this meant that we should just keep things simple.”
I narrow my eyes and she quickly clears up exactly what I was about to say this sounds like. “It’s not me being taken advantageof or anything. I wasn’t pushed into it. It’s just, I don’t even know. After that first time, it felt nice to know that maybe others could be interested in me too.”
“So, you’re sleeping with him for validation?” There’s no hiding how much I dislikethatidea, but she shakes her head hard.
“No.No!That’s… shoot. I like him, and I’m certain he likes me now as well. It’s hard to put into words, but he makes me feel like I’m important to him. I want to be important to someone, you know?”
She’s staring at me with so much hope that I’ll understand, my irritation begins to thaw. Idounderstand what’s she saying. She’s looking for someone to value her.
Running my fingers through my damp hair, I sigh. “I know what you’re saying. It’s like a mutual arrangement, a friends with benefits kind of thing.”
It’s adorable the way she wrinkles her nose. “I suppose so. I don’t even know anymore. But I like it. It’s…” She trails off and blushes just before she covers her face with her hands. “God, I’m sorry. There’s no way you want to hear all of this.”
Pulling her hand away, I dip my head to get her to look at me. “I told you before and I’ll tell you again. I don’t mind talking things out with you. I’ll always be that for you.”
With a nervous smile, she silently thanks me. “So, what now? We just going to sit here until the storm passes? This one seems as if it’s going to stick around a bit.”
I debate if Ishouldsay anything about how I’m feeling now. Deep down, I know if I don’t speak up, I’ll possibly lose my chance in the future. Carefully, I steer the topic back to where I can bring up my interest in her.
“We can drive somewhere in a minute, but I want to ask you something.”
She sits up straighter and nods. “You can ask me anything, Jaxon.”
Tapping my fingers on my thigh, I just go for it. “Are you only looking for the kind of arrangement you have with this guy? Or is dating someone something that’s on the table for you?”
Edith’s mouth pops open, then she snaps it shut and looks away as she considers my question. Slowly, she begins with, “I’ve not given it much thought, to be honest. My initial answer would be yes. That’s definitely something I’d love to do. Especially because I’ve never done it before. But it’s a little difficult to actually make that a reality right now.”
“Because of the situation you’re in that you haven’t fully told me about.” I don’t phrase that as a question. It’s a truth we both know.
Her mouths tightens in the corners and she nods once sharply.
“But you would want to explore that once you’re out of your situation?” I stress the last word and it’s obvious she’s relieved I don’t press her for more details. But I do add, “Eventually Iamgoing to ask questions, but I want to ask this now. Are you getting closer to being able to get out of it?”
“Yes,” she breathes out happily. “Yes, to your first question, I mean. And also, yes to the second. I’ve managed to put aside some savings since I started working. I actually planned on talking to the pastor and Mrs. Danielson for help to find a little place I could rent.”
Taking a breath, I go for it. “Good, that’sreallygood.” I turn on the engine of my truck to let the heat warm us up. Unsure what to do now, I ask, “Do you want to come with me back to my place, or do you need to head home?”
