I take a tentative step towards him, not wanting to overwhelm him further.
“I adore you, Shaun. Please believe me.”
Shaun’s fingers stop drumming and he meets my gaze with those gorgeous brown eyes.
“You said I was the best man you’ve ever met,” he says.
I nod, rapidly. “I meant it. I think you’re amazing, Shaun.”
His eyes turn dewy, his mouth pursing within his beard. “I don’t know if I can take another heartbreak this year, Freddie.”
Shit, shit, shit! I’m losing him. This isn’t how it’s meant to go! We can’t make it official and break up on the same day!
I leap forward and take his hand. “I swear I would never do that to you!”
“Maybe we’re moving too fast—”
“I promise you, Shaun! I’m serious about you.” An invisible puppet master takes control of my limbs, and I vault up onto the counter.
Shaun gasps. “Freddie, what are you—”
I place my hands on his shoulders and the final defences come tumbling down.
“I’m yours, Shaun Harrison. No one else’s. Since I met you, you’re all I think about. Your passion, your bravery, how you leap to my defence like a bloody German Shepherd without me even having to ask! I’m still pinching myself that you thinkI’mgood enough for you.” I plant a soft kiss on his lips then pull back. “You really think I’d be crazy enough to let you go? Trust me, I would not be getting up at five a.m. for just anyone! You’ve already given me more than you know and I’ll give you all I can in return.” I lean in and kiss him again, then look him dead in the eye. “I will never hurt you.”
Shaun swallows, thickly. His lip quivers. Then, he gives a tiny, almost imperceptible nod.
“I believe you.”
28
Shaun
Dinnerdateroundtwo.
I park outside Freddie’s house and wing him a quick text, telling him I’ve arrived. Instantly, he fires one back to let me know that, barring any more home invasions, he’ll be right out. Heart fluttering, I tuck my phone away and smile to myself.
We’re going out, as an actual couple! I would have taken him out the other night but after an entire soap opera unfolded in the café, I wasn’t capable of holding a conversation with anyone, even Freddie, so we decided to hold off till the weekend. Probably for the best.
My stomach flutters with anticipation, mainly because of all the things Freddie’s promised we’ll do after dinner. Avenues we haven’t explored yet. Bases we haven’t touched. We both made it down to the sexual health clinic for testing and, on Freddie’s advice, I’ve been preparing myself every night, making sure my body is ready for him. If what I’ve felt during my solo exploration is anything to go by, I think I’m in for a wild evening. But first, I’m going to spoil him rotten.
A quick glance at my reflection in the rear-view mirror tells me I look exactly the same as the last fifty times I checked. A modest trim of the beard and some hair wax go a long way. It’s been a whilesince I got dressed up and my old suit is at least a size too small but I think I look passably smart.
There’s a crunch of shoes on gravel and I look up to see not Freddie, but Rory, marching like an elephant down the driveway towards me. Oh no, what does he want?
I roll down the window, but only a quarter of the way.
“Hi—” I begin, but Rory cuts across me.
“Hello. Freddie and I have been talking and it seems I was mistaken.”
His face is rigid, impossible to read.
“Mistaken how?” I ask.
Rory reaches into his pocket and pulls out a crisp fifty-pound note. With two fingers, he posts it through the gap in the window.
“I’d like you two to have a good time.” His voice is oddly robotic. Even more than usual. “On me. Consider this an apology.”