Page 14 of Hard Rock Muse

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“Elton John,” I said immediately. “Stevie Wonder.”

“They’re solo artists, and they play piano,” he pointed out. “Name a member of a rock band.”

Julian was right that the lead singers and guitarists were usually the most well known band members.

“Keith Emerson,” I said.

“From Emerson, Lake and Palmer?” Julian asked. “Cheater. His name is in the band’s name.”

Not to mention, he shared a name with my other ex. I’d always have bad associations with that name.

“It’s fine,” he said. “I never wanted my face out there. It’s all about the music.”

Julian did shy away from the spotlight. He always had been about the music before anything else. The music always came first.

And that fact helped bring about the end of our band.

“How is Keith, by the way?” Julian asked. The twist of his lips told me he hated to ask and was only doing it to be polite.

Anxiety spiked through my chest. The last thing I wanted to talk about was Keith Fielding, the producer who had offered Where Angels Burn a major label contract. The one I’d turned to for comfort when Julian left me and the band.

The one who fucked me up inside and got me blackballed from the industry when I finally mustered the courage to leave him.

“He’s not in the picture anymore,” I said shortly.

“Oh?”

Julian’s tone was curious, but he must have caught my tone because he didn’t press.

“What else have you been up to?” he asked, continuing the interrogation from before. I’d never actually answered the question.

“Oh, you know, the usual.” I waved my hand around vaguely in the air. “Some behind the scenes stuff.” I crammed a roll in my mouth so I didn’t have to keep talking.

The truth was, I hadn’t been doing anything. After Keith, no one in the industry would work with Ever Darling. I mostly kept to myself, did a lot of reading, some volunteer work. In the beginning, I tried to write songs, but it was too painful. I’d only recently been able to look at my guitar again.

“Stuff like songwriting?” Julian asked.

I didn’t respond, just continued chewing.

“What about you?” I asked once I’d swallowed the roll. I needed to steer the conversation away from me. “How have you been doing?”

“Great,” he said. “Really great. Cherry Lips is the best thing to happen to me.”

A pang of hurt went through me. At one time, he would have said meeting me was the best thing that had ever happened.

“The guys are like my brothers,” he continued. “And Cerise is a force to be reckoned with. People with that passion and drive are rare. We just clicked. We saw something inside each other.”

“It sounds like you’ve really found your place,” I said, pushing down the pain radiating through my chest.

“They’re my family.”

A sad look crossed his face. As he flicked his gaze to the side, I knew Julian was thinking about his own biological family. He hated talking about it and I never pushed him, but I knew his mom left when he was young, leaving him in the care of an aunt. From what I’d sensed throughout the years we’d been together, it hadn’t been the most welcoming of environments.

It must have been a good feeling, to find a place where you were wanted.

“The group has been good for Seth, too,” Julian said.

I clenched my jaw to keep from spitting out a curse word. My hands curled into fists. I put them in my lap.