Page 42 of Feral Touch
“I'm worried that you think I'm trying to use my money to guilt you into being with me.”
“You said you wanted there to be a reason for me to be with you. That you didn't think I'd like you anymore. Then you offered me money.”
“That was never my intention. At all.” Ren took my hand and looked me in the eye, putting every ounce of sincerity into his expression that he could. “I know what I said sounded bad. I just meant that if you had to leave, if you had to go back home, I’d lose my chance.” He rubbed his thumb across the back of my hand in slow, sweeping motions, turning my insides into mush. “I didn't want to lose my chance to be with you.”
“What you said really hurt.”
“I'm sorry.”
“And then you just shut me out when I refused.”
Ren paused, looking pained for a brief moment. “It wasn't because you turned me down. It was just— you said something that triggered a sore spot.” He looked away, his mouth turned down into a troubled grimace. “You couldn't have known. I don't blame you.”
“What did I say?” Whatever it was, I never wanted to say it again.
He blew out a breath and sunk back into the sofa cushions. “How much do you know about my parents?”
Had I been right? Was there something about his mom and dad?
“I don't remember much about them. They were never really around.”
He glanced over at me quickly. “It's going to sound so stupid.”
I bit my lip and shifted on the sofa until I was pressed up against his side.“Tell me.”
“I was never very close with people growing up,” he started.
“You were always kind of a lone wolf.”
“It wasn't because I wanted to be. I just learned it was better to be by myself.”
I hesitated before asking softly. “Why?”
“My friends were only my friends because I had money.” He blurted out in one breath. “I had the coolest toys, the newest video games, the best car. None of them actually cared about me.” His eyes flicked to me. “Except you. You never asked me to buy you anything. You never even mentioned my money.”
“It honestly never occurred to me,” I said, surprised. “I knew your parents gave you lots of stuff, but—” I shrugged.
“They gave me everything. Anything I wanted, anything I asked for, even things I didn't ask for. They showered me with…juststuff.I think it was how they consoled themselves. How they made themselves feel better. How they convinced themselves that they weren't bad parents.” He turned his face away, expression clouded with discomfort. “But it didn't work. I still knew.”
“Knew what?”
He was silent for a moment before answering. “They hated me. They wished I'd never been born.”
I sat up, shocked. “Ren, I'm sure that's not true.”
“Iknowit's true.”
“Is—is that why you left?”
He clamped his mouth shut and looked away.
I was stunned. I couldn't imagine what it felt like to think your parents hated you. I'd always known how much my parents cared for me. I'd never doubted it.
Ren's lips twisted into a bitter smile. “It's stupid, right? Poor little rich kid, mommy and daddy didn't love him.” He looked away and murmured something.
“…And they had reason to.”
Had I heard that right? Did Ren think he had done something to deserve his parent’s hatred? Tears stung the back of my eyes. I wrapped my arms around Ren's neck, practically climbing into his lap to give him a hug.
