Page 31 of Love Heals
Silas looked away. "I never got anything I didn't deserve. The way I was treated always depended on the way I behaved."
Jared wasn't sure what to say in response to that, how to make Silas seeno onedeserved to be treated the way he had been among the vampires, but at the same time he knew no matter what he said, Silas wouldn't understand. He wasn't ready to, his mind still clinging to patterns that he'd needed to form to survive and that had become too familiar to be abandoned easily.
A thought came to Jared, then. If he wanted to shock Silas out of his familiar pattern, maybe he needed to get out of his own comfort zone as well.
"You should bite me again," he suggested. "Read my memories instead of your own this time."
Silas eyed him suspiciously. "Your memories?"
"My memories of you." If it could get Silas to see himself the way Jared saw him, it would be perfect. Jared could withstand a small bite for that.
And it might feel good too.
Jared pushed that thought aside. He wasn't doing this because he wanted to get off. He was doing this because he wanted to help Silas.
Nothing wrong with getting off at the same time,a small voice in his head said, but Jared tried to pay it no mind. This wasn't the time for that. He wasn't going to let himself be manipulated by his attraction for the vampire. He couldn't take a wrong step with Silas, couldn't let him think that he was doing this only because he wanted to do things to him he'd never done to another man before.
Silas had been taken advantage of by too many men like that too many times.
Jared would never allow it to happen again, and he wouldn'tbecomeone of those men either.
Slowly, to give Silas time to withdraw, he moved from his chair to sit on the edge of the bed.
Silas hesitated. "You're really okay with letting me bite you?"
"I trust you," Jared said, keeping his tone even.
"You have no reason to. I tricked you before."
Instead of giving a direct response to that, Jared exposed his neck.
Silas inched closer. "I don't understand you."
"But do you trust me?"
Silas's lips were close to Jared's skin when he spoke again. "Promise not to make me see my own memories again."
"Promise."
That seemed to be enough for Silas. The next moment, he sank his teeth into Jared's neck, breaking his skin and drawing blood. It was an odd sensation. Jared had felt it before, but he'd had no chance to get used to it then, since Silas had drawn away so quickly once that memory had started playing.
Relax,Jared told himself. After all, this was what he wanted, even if it felt weird to know that his blood was being sucked out of him—and that he wanted to do nothing about it at the same time. In fact, he wanted it to continue. There was something sinfully erotic about the way Silas's lips moved on his skin, drinking his blood. It made shivers roll down his spine that had nothing to do with whatever it was vampires injected into their bite to make their victims more willing.
A few seconds into the bite, he lost the ability to move his limbs. It should have been scary, but strangely enough, he felt just fine.Morethan fine...
There was something powerful about surrendering control this way.
This moment, Silas could have done with him whatever he wanted.
The thought alone made him hard.
God, he really needed to clamp down on that.Memories, he reminded himself.You were going to show him memories.
An image formed in front of his mind's eye. The memory he'd wanted Silas to see. It had been a warm day at the beginning of summer when everyone was starting to crave ice cream again. Michael presented a tub of the stuff to his friends, chocolate-chip flavored as he announced proudly. They'd gathered near the bridge under which they so often slept. The bushes around them were littered with trash and broken glass—as well as broken needles—but nobody paid that any attention as they pressed closer to gather around Michael.
"I got enough for everyone!" he said with a smile on his face.
"You made a lot of cash last night, huh?" Jimmy asked with a knowing look. "It's not fair Cornell always picks you. The dude's loaded. I want some of his cash too." Jimmy wasn't unattractive by any means, with his lithe body and his tanned skin, but Jared suspected that the men going after Michael were going after a particular type that Jimmy didn't exactly embody.
