"This is different. It's not about exposing yourself to danger or not."
"Then what is it about? And don't tell me that it's better for me not to see Crimson. I already know something's wrong with him. I can't even text him and that's just... that's weird." I tried not to let myself thing about it too deeply, because if I did, I would freak out with worry, but I couldn't entirely banish the thought either. Shutting off my brain was something I'd never been able to do.
Talon shook his head. "Even if you say that, I don't believe Crimson would want you to see him right now."
Collin claimed that his boyfriend was getting better at navigating human emotions, but I wasn't so sure, because that? That didnotmake me feel better. It didn't make me want to drop the topic either. "Now I definitely need to see him."
"We should head back home. You can see Crimson after the bomb has gone off and Nicolai has been taken care of."
"But that's just it. I can't..." I trailed off, unsure how to put this into words the vampire would understand. How could I make him see that I couldn't sit around waiting for my bomb to go off without having Crimson by my side? I needed Crimson to remind myself why I was doing all this.
Why it was okay for me to build explosives.
I rubbed my face with the palm of my hand.
"I can't go home right now," I said, because it was the truth. So far, getting the materials for my bomb, and then building it, obsessing over my plan, had kept me too busy to freak out, but if I went home now, with nothing more to do but wait and worry, I'd come unglued, fall apart like one of those DIY-projects where you had too many screws left over by the end. That was how I felt. Like I was someone's crazy science project, missing too many screws and all the ones that were left were coming loose.
At least some of what I said seemed to translate to Talon, because he didn't dismiss me again. Instead, he took his phone out of his pocket. "Your brother is going to be displeased."
"Which one?" I asked, then waved him off before he could answer. "All of them, I know, and my sister too. I don't care." As much as I loved my family, I really needed them to back off sometimes. "I'm sorry if you have to sleep on the couch."
Talon raised an eyebrow at me before glancing back at his phone. It seemed like he was typing out a message. "Why would I sleep on the couch?"
"Never mind." I flicked my wristband against my skin, wondering how long it would take us to get from here to Aldrich's place. "So you're gonna take me?"
Talon looked up at me. "I just let Aldrich know we're coming. It's only polite. I also told Collin where we're going."
"Of course you did." I exhaled, releasing nervous energy. Finally, I was going to see Crimson again.
I had no idea at all what to expect when I stepped into Aldrich's apartment, but I was sure that whatever it was, I could handle it.
I was wrong.