Page 58 of Love Bleeds
"I'm not sure about that either." He set the pepper shaker aside and turned to me. "It feels like everything's up in the air right now."
"That's why you're cooking?" I glanced at the pot.
"I guess. It takes my mind off things." He turned to the stove again to turn the heat down. "I've also prepared chicken sticks for lunch tomorrow. They’re sitting in the fridge." He sighed. "I feel like I need to dosomething, you know? But I can't think of anything else to do."
"I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault." He pulled up a chair and sat at the kitchen island opposite me. "We'll figure everything out somehow, I promise."
And he was back in big-brother mode. I gave him a weak smile. "Do you really believe that?"
"I do." His lack of hesitation surprised me. "I don't know how yet, but we will."
I nodded. "Maybe I need to read Dad's journals too."
"You might want to," he agreed. "I know you were trying to stay out of all this, but--"
I shook my head. "It's not really an option, I realize that. Especially now that Damian is..."
"One of them?"
"He's not one of them," I protested. "He's still Damian, but he's also not, but he's not one of them." I paused. Did any of what I'd just said actually make sense? "I want to help him remember who he used to be, but he won't let me. He thinks I'm just confused."
Remy studied me for a long moment. I knew in his head, he was already choosing the words he wanted to say, and I already dreaded hearing him. He was going to tell me that Damian was probably right and that I shouldn't rush into anything. That I needed to becareful.
But then he surprised me.
"Maybe you need to take the initiative," he said.
I blinked. Was my big brother actually encouraging me to take a risk?
"C'mon, Luke," he said. "I know you. You never stay confused about anything for long. You've had a thousand thoughts before you've even opened your eyes in the morning. If this thing with Damian is something you want to try, I'm sure you've thought about it long and hard."
I flushed. "I am still a little confused," I admitted. "But I don't know how to stop being confused without gathering more data."
Gathering more data... sheesh, could I have made it sound any less romantic than that?
Remy ruffled his hand through my hair. "I say go for it. I've watched you two together for a long time."
"Wait, did you... did youknow?" I stared at my brother.
"I suspected that Damian had a crush on you, yes. C'mon, he's had dinner with us how many times a week? I'm not blind," Remy said as if was no big deal at all. "I also knew that you were totally oblivious to it."
"You could have told me!"
"Wasn't my place."
"I don't know if I'm gay," I said, moving my glass of water between my hands.
"I don't think that's something you need to figure out right now. There's only two questions you need to ask yourself. The first is, do you want to kiss Damian or not?"
"I do," I said, because it was the truth, even though it made my cheeks burn hot.
Remy nodded. "That's fine."
"What's the second question?"
"Do you also want to kiss Crimson?"
