Page 45 of A Dragon's Miracle (Fires of Fate)
Ryan
IletFinn accompany me to the hospital when they ran the tests. Everything I'd told him about wanting to make things easier on him was true, but it wasn't the whole picture either. I wanted this check-up for my own reasons too. I was doing worse than I should be, and I'd burned through my medicine faster than ever before... and I wasn't sure why. Yes, I was coming to terms with the fact that this wasit, but if there was anything regular medicine could do to slow the process down, I needed to know. I'd only just gotten together with Finn. I didn't want to leave him so soon.
He stuck with me the entire time the doctors poked and prodded me. I didn't think this could stop him from chasing after Jin in the long term. After all, I knew exactly what desperation felt like, but at least he wouldn't run off immediately. That meant I still had time to think of a way to dissuade him from going after Jin.
I also let Finn accompany me when I went back to discuss test results. The more involved he felt, the better.
The oncologist on my case, a young female with a friendly smile, sat down with me and Finn in her office.
“Mr. Chen,” she addressed me. “I received some of your test results, and I'd like to discuss them with you.”
I nodded.
She looked to Finn, then back to me. “Are you certain you don't want more privacy for this conversation? Some of this is quite personal.”
I shook my head. “No, this is fine. Anything you have to tell me, you can tell him as well.” I grabbed Finn's hand. “We're in this together.”
The way Finn squeezed my hand told me I'd said just the right thing.
“Well, all right, if you're sure...” She leaved through her papers.
“I am.” I took a breath to steel myself. “How bad is it?”
She looked at me with sympathy in her eyes. “I believe we've found the reason you're feeling more tired later. Aside from the cancer, that is. I mean, we’d like to run an ultrasound later, but judging from your blood levels, my best guess is that you're pregnant.”
I was... what?
My mouth dropped open and cold sweat broke out on my skin.
“What?” Finn asked, while I didn't have the necessary air to voice my shock. If I was pregnant then… fuck, how could Ibepregnant? I could have sworn I was infertile.
“How certain are you?” I asked.
“Very certain.” She sighed. “I’m used to congratulating couples when I tell them they’re expecting, but in your case, this is far from ideal. A pregnancy might complicate a few things. In any case, we need to refer you to an OB/GYN to discuss further.”
“Yeah… I… agree.” I spoke the words slowly because I felt like I was surrounded by a thick sort of fog that cut me off from everything including my own feelings. This news was simply too much to process. I could hold it together when it was only my life on the line, but now there was a baby growing inside of me too?
That was… that was…
“Could you leave us alone for a moment?” Finn spoke up, his voice cutting through the haze in my head. I was so glad at least one of us still had the clarity of mind to articulate himself properly.
“Of course.” The doctor left.
Once she was gone, Finn kneeled in front of me, taking both of my hands to make me look at him. “Hey,” he said. “I know you’re shocked right now, but it’s going to be fine, okay?”
I sniffed. Finn and his endless optimism. How could he think things were going to be fine? This was so far from fine.
“I also know you don’t want kids, but—”
“It’s not like that,” I cut in. “The reason I didn’t want kids was because I’m sick, you know? And because I honestly thought I couldn’t.” All those times Jin and I had… Oh God, what if this washiskid? I could never let him have it. If this kid was going to make it at all. That last thought made me feel nauseous. I’d barely known about this child for a few minutes and already I couldn’t stand the thought of losing it to this goddamn disease.
Finn let go of my hands only to stroke a lock of hair back from my face. “So you’re not opposed to having a child.”
I sighed. “Finn, let’s be realistic here. Even if everything somehow works out and this baby makes it and the pregnancy doesn’t kill me in the process…” I broke off. I knew I was painting a pretty black picture, but in this case, I felt like black was the only color I had in my palette. Dragon pregnancies werehard.Even when you were healthy. On the upside, they also went by twice as fast as regular pregnancies. There was a chance the kid could make it before my time ran out.
“Bond with me,” Finn said.
“What?” I stared at him. “Are you out of your mind?”
