Page 85 of Wretched Soul
“You mean about him strolling into my supposedly secure apartment?”
“He was the one who taught me how to pick my first lock,” I say. “I warned you my family is unhinged.”
Lily twists on my lap so she can straddle me. “You warned me about a lot of things,” she says, resting her hands on my chest.
I try to ignore where our bodies connect, but my cock doesn’t follow orders and strains against my zipper. I put my hands on her hips, preparing to lift her off me if I need to. “Can you remember what we talked about before?” I ask, testing her recovery.
“I have your number, and if your scare tactics fail, I can call you and ask you your name.”
“Good girl,” I tell her because it might be the last chance I get to say it. I won’t chase her again, for her sake, and it’s the hardest decision I’ll ever make. Life-changing. If I don’t get that call, I’ll be sentenced to a life on my own. If Lily isn’t the one, no one is.
She leans closer. “Either way, I won’t simply ghost you,” she promises.
My fingers dig into her soft flesh as she moves against me. “You have to, Lily. Show me no mercy. If you’re only calling to say no, I’d rather not hear it.”
“Shade–”
A notification on my phone breaks the spell, and I stand up, taking Lily with me. “Behave,” I say, setting her down on her bed as I check my messages. “Kaitlyn’s on her way over.”
Chapter 29
Mace
For the first few days, it was easy to keep myself occupied. I wanted Lily to be certain before she decided to be my forever person. I’d given it my best shot of scaring her off, and I took it as a good sign that she didn’t immediately jump off my lap and demand I leave.
I’d stayed until the doctor arrived. She was impressed with Lily’s recovery, and assured me there were no lasting effects. That meant Lily would have understood everything I shared about myself – the good and the bad.
It’s the bad that worries me, and as the weekend approaches, I regret not making a better case for thegood.
But what good can come of her involvement with me? I’d promised to protect her, but I’d set it out in a way that would make any reasonable person feel smothered. And smothering is exactly what I’m doing as I pace the floor of my apartment on Saturday evening, earbuds in as I listen to the activity in Lily’s living room. She’s home alone, and when she starts watching Titanic, I pull up the film on my widescreen TV. I keep it on mute so I can sync it with the audio playing on Lily’s TV. I pretend we’re watching it together. Is this my life from now on?
“Mace, this is not how you should be spending your Saturday night,” Reid says, stepping in front of the screen to get my attention. “You’ve been miserable all week, and I don’t want to spoil the movie, but this film doesn’t end well. You should come to the club with me.”
“No.”
My brother’s dressed in a deep blue button-down and suit pants. I should have known he was nearby from the stench of his cologne. Meanwhile, I’m in sweats and a t-shirt that I’m minded to plant in Lily’s apartment just to remind her I exist.
“How about I bring the party back here?”
I have to look around Reid to see the TV. “Do, and I’ll kill you.”
He puffs out his cheeks and blows air through pursed lips. “Don’t tell me she’s dumped you. I thought girls got turned on by men killing for them.”
Everyone knows what happened to Lily, and I can’t blame Ash or Jake. We’d had a mid-week dinner over at the house, and Connie had innocently asked if my girlfriend was feeling better. The questions had started to fly, and the only way to shut Reid and Maddie up, had been to tell them about the spiked drink.
“I haven’t been dumped because she isn’t my girlfriend,” I say. I don’t know what Lily is, but if there was spyware out there that could tell me what was going on inside her head, I’d be using it right now.
“You’ve lived in the same sweats for three days and you haven’t left the apartment. Something’s wrong.”
“Go get laid, Reid. I’m busy.”
“Fine, I’m going,” he says with an exasperated sigh. “But next week is Thanksgiving, and you’d better be out of this funk by then. And if you want to watch a movie, watch a fucking comedy, not some tear-fest.”
Reid is right about the film, and when Lily switches off her TV, her sobs scratch against my soul. I think she’s crying over more than the film, and that fills me with dread. I stare at my phone, not sure if I should send her a message. What harm would it do to let her know that I’m thinking of her?
Instead, I open up one of the dating apps she uses. In an act of pure masochism, I’d restored all of her accounts yesterday. I want to see who I’m up against in Lily’s dating pool. What if she prefers some dude who’d stand to the side with a fire extinguisher while I burned down the world for her? If he’s out there, I don’t see him, but what I do see has my stomach hollowing. Lily’s been active on the site. Swiping left, but still. She’s looking for a Mr. Swipe Right.
It looks like I have my answer, and my life is officially over.
