“Oh?” Alastair feigned shock. “Well, that’s certainly news to me. Your holier-than-thou attitude suggested otherwise.”
A spark of annoyance hit me in the chest, and I stepped toward him. He tipped his chin up and held my gaze. “So defiant,” I said. Tangled in the web of annoyance was another, much stronger emotion. Hope. “What happened to the male who awaited my orders and lowered his gaze in my presence?”
“He woke up.” Alastair moved closer, bringing him a mere inch or so away.
Woke up… a lot like my heart right then. “Good.”
That gave him pause. “Good?”
“Yes.” I slid a hand to his neck, reveling in the smoothness of his skin. His pulse thrummed beneath my palm, quickening. “I don’t want your eyes on the ground, Pride. I want them on me.”
Alastair dragged in a shaky breath—a breath that tickled my mouth as he exhaled.
“Tell me what you want.” I glanced at his parted lips, fighting the urge to claim them. I’d been fighting for so long. “If you don’t want this… if you don’t wantme… I’ll mend the seal to rid you of these feelings.”
Understanding lit his expression. “That’s what you meant earlier? You weren’t choosing duty over me. You thought it was what I wanted. Gods.” He chuckled low. “Talk about an epic misunderstanding.”
“Your reaction makes sense now,” I said, relieved by it. Clara was right. All we’d needed to do was communicate. That was one mystery solved, yet another remained. “You didn’t answer the question. Tell me what you want. Fate chose us to be together, but I won’t force it on you.”
I refused to allow hope to build more in my chest.
“Answer one of my questions first. Mending the seal won’t fully take away your feelings. It will only take them from me. Is that whatyouwant?”
A painful truth. But as I’d learned long ago, my wants were of little consequence. “I survived the past two thousand years with unrequited feelings. I can do so again.”
“You’re so maddening,” Alastair whispered, leaning in so close we shared the same pocket of air. Tingles rippled across my flesh. “Stop living your life to please others. When are you going to take what you want, Lazarus?”
The evening blossoms permeated the air with citrus and floral notes, but as the tip of my nose grazed Alastair’s, only one scent settled over me. Sweet cedar.
One moment. That’s all it would take for everything I’d built to be destroyed. My palm slid to his nape, and my fingers curled in the back of his short blond hair. Alastair’s breaths shortened as I ghosted my lips over his.
One moment. One decision.
I envisioned the crossroads I had been stalled at for so long; one direction led to the obedient life of a warrior who denied himself the happiness he so craved. The other path?
It led to him.
To my destined mate.
“Laz?” Alastair’s voice shook. He angled his head, our mouths only a hairs width apart.
“You wish for me to take what I want? Allow me to show you.” With the smallest push of my head, I made my choice. I kissed him.
As our lips connected, something inside me shattered. A rough whimper clawed its way up my throat, a sound that echoed in his as well. The depth of emotion that slammed into me right then was unlike anything I had felt before.
The seal was no longer cracked.
It had broken completely.
Chapter Eleven
Alastair
The stirrings of attraction I had felt since learning of our bond were nothing compared to what I felt as Lazarus kissed me. The moment our lips touched, my entire body jolted, then trembled. The intensity shook me to my core. Sounds tore through me, hoarse whimpers and needy moans.
Even more surprising? He made the same sounds. And as he pressed closer to me, his body shook too.
“What’s happening?” I asked against his mouth.