Page 58 of Frost
“I go where the season takes me,”Jack once said.
However, no matter where he goes or how far, I know he’ll always return to me in the morning. The thought soothes me enough to fall asleep.
“Luka.”
I groan and open my eyes to a dark room. Jack’s hovering over me with snow on his sweater and a tender gleam in his pale blue eyes.
“Hello, handsome,” he says.
“Jack? What time is it?”
“A little after one.” He slides a hand to my cheek. “Sorry to wake you, but it’s important.”
The tone of his voice pulls me from the bleariness of sleep, and I stare at him more alert than before. “What’s wrong?”
“I have something for you.” Jack lifts something off his neck.
A ball of lead drops into the pit of my stomach when he holds it out for me to see. I touch the tear-shaped blue jewel. “Your mother’s necklace? Jack, I can’t take this.”
“But I want you to,” he says, putting it over my head. He places his hand over my chest where the jewel rests on my skin. “So no matter what, a part of me will always be with you.”
“Why does that sound like you’re saying goodbye?” Anxiety winds through my gut, and I sit up in the bed.
“It’s not goodbye.” Jack lightly moves his fingertips along my jaw. “I know we’ll see each other again.”
“I’m confused.” I squeeze my eyes closed before opening them again. I force myself to breathe, to think things through rationally. No reason to panic right now. “Where are you going?”
Maybe he’s traveling to the other side of the world to spread winter, so he’ll be gone for a few days or more. He’s letting me have the necklace until he gets back so it’ll bring me some peace of mind. Right?
“Away,” he says. “And you can’t follow me.”
“Away? That’s not a real answer, Jack. Fucking cut the cryptic shit and talk to me.”
Just this morning, Jack woke me with a blowjob; then we cooked breakfast together, laughing and kissing between flipping the bacon and mixing the pancake batter. Why is he leaving? All of this is coming out of nowhere.
“You have my heart, Luka Michael Summers,” Jack says, ghosting his lips over mine. There’s a slight tremble in his body as he cups the back of my head and pulls me closer. “Loving you has changed me. You make me crave things I can no longer deny myself. You’re worth the price.”
“The price?” I ask, my confusion intensifying. “What price? What are you—” It feels like I’m punched in the stomach when I finally understand. I meet his sad gaze and shake my head. “No. Absolutely not.”
“It’s not your decision, Luka.” Jack links our fingers as another tremble shakes him. “I know you’re content with the way things are. You love me enough to lie to your family and friends, to miss out on so many experiences in life. But I don’t want you to just be content with me. I want you to be happy. Truly happy.”
“Iamhappy with you, Jack.” I squeeze his hand and search his face, hoping he can see how serious I am. “I don’t need anything more.”
“But I do.” He rests his head against mine, and I feel cold, wet tears drip on my shoulder. “I want to walk with you beneath sunlight instead of just the moon. I want to meet your parents, go shopping with you, and do all of these ordinary, human things that everyone else takes for granted. I want to grow old with you by my side and know that when you leave this life, I’ll shortly follow.” More tears fall. “I want to have a mortal life with you.”
“But your memories…” I choke on a quiet sob and press my face into his hair. “Jack… no.”
“I’ve spent this past week thinking it over, and my decision is made. I’m leaving tonight.” A shaky breath escapes him. “I spent the entire evening flying with Págos and saying a silent goodbye to the places I hold dear, like the river where you caught your first tiny fish and the cave with the precious moments of the past.” Those momentsbeing his ice sculptures, I bet—the Spartan whose memory he kept alive all these years. “I soared through the night sky and felt the cold air whipping through my hair one last time. I’m ready to move on now.”
There’s no changing his mind. I hear it in his voice. He’s set on his decision.
“How does Págos feel about this?” I ask.
“It’s bittersweet for both him and I,” Jack responds. “He’ll miss me, but he understands how much I want this.‘For years, you’ve let me keep my wings. And now I’m giving you yours,’he told me. I know he’ll watch over me, even when I can’t remember him.”
“How will it work? How do you become mortal?”
“Hecate can only be summoned when standing where three paths meet,” he says. “And the summoning can only be performed at night when the moon is still in the sky. I’ve summoned her once before for this very thing but backed down when she told me the price I would have to pay. She said to call on her again when I was ready to pay it.”
