Page 89 of His Temptation
“That’s great,” I said. As happy as I was for Emery, I also felt sad. Ryan was putting forth effort to get close to him again. All of that progress would be ruined once Ryan found out about me. “Maybe we should end this.”
“What?” Emery looked at me.
“If we stop now, Ryan won’t ever know. We can go our separate ways.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Do you want to lose your son, Emery?” I got off the bed to put space between us. Because if I looked into his blue eyes I wouldn’t be able to hold myself together. “If he finds out about us, he’ll hate us both. You guys are rebuilding your relationship, and the last thing you need is another secret that—”
Emery shot off the bed and backed me up against the wall, his hand sliding along the side of my neck. “I don’t want to loseyoueither.”
“I’m just a guy you’re fucking,” I said, my chest tight. Saying goodbye to Emery was going to shatter me. But I had to do it. I refused to be selfish and keep him when it would only cause him heartache later.
“No, you’re not.”
My heart soared at his words but fell when I realized I couldn’t keep him. I was such an idiot to chase my best friend’s dad.
What did I expect to happen? That Ryan would be okay with it and me and Emery would live happily ever after? It was a disaster from the start, like a roller coaster missing the end of its track. The ride was fun for a while, but the damn thing would crash and burn in the end.
“It was fun, and I care about you, but we can’t do this anymore,” I said, trying to weasel out of his hold. He placed an arm on the wall beside my head, caging me in. It reminded me of the night in the hotel when I’d tried to stophimfrom leaving.
“Stop trying to leave me.” His nostrils flared, and I thought he was pissed. But when I saw the pain shining in his eyes, my sternum physically hurt, like someone was yanking it out. “Goddammit, Cason, I love you.”
They were the words I had kept inside for so long, and now he was the one saying them.
“Y-you love me?”
“I do.” Emery traced the line of my jaw with his thumb. “I know it’s too soon to say it, but I can’t hold it back anymore. I love you, and I don’t want you to leave. We can figure this out. Just… stay. Please.”
It no longer felt one-sided. I had felt selfish for complicating Emery’s life, but he didn’t see me as a complication at all. This crazy, amazing connection between us was real. Not just in my head.
“I don’t want to be the reason you and Ryan have another falling-out.”
“Cason?” Emery grabbed my face with both hands and tilted my head up. His lips were inches from mine. “I’m a grown-ass man and can make my own decisions. Stop worrying and kiss me already.”
I closed the gap between our mouths, softly whimpering as my emotions finally broke through. My worry. My fear. But most importantly, my love.
“I love you too,” I panted, breaking from his lips.
“Show me,” he said, wrapping his arm around my lower back.
And then I took him back to bed and did exactly that, kissing him deeply while I pumped into his ass nice and slow.
The nerve-racking start to the day faded as we got lost in each other between the sheets. Everything meant so much more now—every kiss, stroke, and gentle embrace. By midafternoon, we finally pulled apart and showered before finding something to eat.
As much as I didn’t want to, I left around ten that night to go back to the apartment. Emery had asked me to stay, but we weren’t living together, and it didn’t feel right to invade his space so much.
Mom and Steve were in the small kitchen when I walked in, smoking up the whole damn place because they didn’t open a window before lighting up their cigarettes.
“Look who’s alive,” Steve said, curling his upper lip at me. “Disappear for days at a time without a damn word. It’d be nice if you could pay your half of the bills, you ungrateful little fuck.”
The drastic change of mood was staggering.
With Emery, I had felt loved and wanted. Like nothing could touch me. Walking through the front door to my mom’s place, though, the warmth and happiness fled and left nothing but emptiness and a cold chill that settled deep in my bones.
Shutting myself in my room, I locked the door and plopped down on the bed. Steve’s loud voice came through the paper-thin walls, shit-talking me and calling me lazy. I scoffed at the ridiculousness.
Only one more month and I’ll be living at the dorm.
