Page 110 of Eryx
I wrapped my cloak around us and pulled him against me. He stared at the stars with an unreadable expression.
“What is it that troubles you?” I asked, once I caught my breath. “And do not lie to me, Ax. I see the distant look in your eyes.”
“Does it bother you that we were sent away from war?” he asked, moving his eyes to me.
His question took me by surprise. He had said very little about the battle since our return. Did he feel the same anger as me about us being sent away?
“Yes,” I answered. “We were provided a mission and did not complete it before leaving. It eats away at me like a festering wound refusing to heal.”
“It does me as well,” he said, returning his attention to the stars. “While I am not fond of warfare, I feel it is my duty as a Spartan to fight when it is asked of us. And yet, here we are, protected by the borders of home when we should be joining our army on the battlefield.”
All the years at his side and he still found ways to leave me in awe. I had assumed he’d been pleased by our return. However, I had misjudged him.
I grazed my fingers along his jaw. “There is my warrior.”
Confusion morphed his features as he regarded me.
“Do you recall the words I spoke to you so long ago?” I asked. “A true warrior fights for what’s in his heart.Do you remember?”
Axios nodded.
I pressed a light kiss to his mouth before laying my head back down. “Neither strength nor speed makes a warrior, for any man can train and excel in such skills,” I said, sliding my finger from his jaw to his bottom lip. “No, atruewarrior goes into battle—not to slay the enemy because they enjoy bloodshed—but because they are protecting all that they hold sacred. That is you, Axios. You are grounded and brave. Stronger than you believe you are—not just in a physical nature but in strength of spirit.”
A pensive look crossed his face as we lay in silence. I watched the movement in his throat as he swallowed, fighting the urge to nibble it. I wondered where his thoughts took him and how long it’d take for him to return to me.
“I do not see what you see,” he said at last. “The man you speak of is a stranger to me.”
“We never see ourselves how others see us,” I responded. “But that does not make them wrong.”
I spoke to Axios, yet I felt the truth of my statement in myself as well. Other men saw me as a strong leader who never failed. They viewed me as the embodiment of what a warrior should be. Nikias had said before that I was the best Sparta had ever seen. However, I did not always see what they did.
I had fears and anxieties—way more than I ever showed. One part of me worried over the idea of returning to battle, while the other seethed with anger that we weren’t with the army. Sometimes when I saw my reflection, I saw my father. His eyes. His hair. And when fear gripped me, I saw his cowardice too.
“Let us go inside,” Axios said, as a cold breeze swept around us.
Once back in our quarters, I pulled him to my chest. A low mumbling reached my ears, and I looked to see Theon roll away from Quill and turn his back to him. Were they fighting again? It was not my place to pry into their private affairs. I only wished they would come to an understanding and soon.
Axios nestled closer, pulling me from my thoughts. It was difficult to think of anything other than how perfectly his warm body fit against mine. I brushed the dark hair from his brow and kissed his forehead. Though I struggled with saying the words, I hoped the kiss would tell him all that I kept locked inside my chest. That he was treasured. That I loved him with every fiber of my being.
As he began to softly snore, I closed my eyes and let sleep take me too.
Chapter Twenty-Three
The next morning, I woke to silence. Men in oursyssitionwere never quiet. They snored in their sleep, belched, and tossed in their beds like pigs in the mud. I heard nothing as I opened my eyes and stared at the sun shining into the room.
Axios nuzzled my neck and softly sighed.
That’s when I realized the reason for the silence: we were the only ones in our quarters. I jolted upward and looked around, finding all the beds empty.
“Ax, you must wake up. We’ve overslept.”
He mumbled and rolled to his stomach. I leaned down to kiss his shoulder and nudged him with my head. When he didn’t move, I bit him. He gasped and opened his eyes.
“I am not your breakfast,” Axios said in a sleep heavy tone. “And it is much too early for games.”
I rose from the bed and gently kicked his side. “Unless you wish to be whipped for being late, you best wake up.”
He grabbed my foot and tried to trip me, and I batted him away before searching for my clothing. As if suddenly understanding my haste, he jumped up and started dressing as well. We grinned as we stepped into our bottoms and nearly toppled over.
