Neither did I.
Axios and I explored each other after we reached our beds. Fingers caressed hard muscle and lips gently met. When we came together, I had to place my hand over his mouth to muffle his moans. He fell asleep shortly afterward, his body spent and exhausted.
I held him a while, tracing the curve of his lips and the slope of his nose. When sleep finally claimed me, I dreamed of a raven soaring above the treetops, its black wings catching the sun. I ran after it, cutting through the tall grass in the valley during my pursuit.
The bird flew higher, in my sight but out of my reach.
Do not leave me, I begged of the raven.
But then it was gone.
Chapter Fourteen
When I woke the next morning, Axios wasn’t beside me. Men slept, tossing and turning on their mats, but he was gone. Before panic took over, though, I forced myself to think rationally. He had been worried about Leanna the night before. Since he wouldn’t join Gaius in the arena for his training until midday, I suspected he’d woken early to visit his sister.
It was not cause for worry.
Not wanting to disturb the sleeping men, I quietly rose from my bed and slipped out of the barracks. Darkness still reigned over Sparta, as the sun had not yet risen. Though faint, a section of the sky appeared lighter than the rest, signaling that it would rise soon.
As I strolled through the courtyard and continued west, men laughed from nearby. As I came upon the soldiers’ housing, several men stumbled in the yard and staggered toward their assigned quarters. Spartans rarely drank to inebriation, as Belos had taught us long ago. Only certain occasions called for drink and merriment: festivals, celebrations of victory in war, and weddings.
“I wager he’s fucking her as we speak,” one of them bellowed before laughing. “The lass won’t be able to stand once he’s done with her.”
“May the gods bless them with a strong son.”
“But not before he’s ridden her long and hard many a times,” another man added, causing the others to laugh.
Ah, so itwasa wedding.
The wedding ceremony had interested me ever since I’d first heard about it. The woman’s hair would be cut short, and she and her intended husband had to brawl, both of them showing their strength. Spartan men had to be strong to fight, and Spartan women had to be strong to bear children. Their fight represented this. But it remained friendly for the most part, neither truly wishing to hurt the other. Then, the man would throw the woman over his shoulder and carry her off to capture her in other ways.
The members of the man’ssyssitionoften drank and celebrated long after he left to bed his new bride, many of them not returning to their beds until dawn.
A figure emerged from the shadows, crashing into me. Thinking it to be an attack from a slave, I slammed them to the ground and jabbed my forearm hard against their throat, pinning them down.
“Galen?” I asked, seeing his face. I released him and sprang to my feet with a light laugh. “Apologies, my friend.”
Galen rubbed his neck where I’d hit him and slowly stood. He swayed on his feet and grabbed the column we stood beside to keep himself upright. It seemed he, too, had partaken in the drinking. I not only saw signs of his poor coordination, but the scent of wine wafted from him.
“Should have applied more pressure and put me out of my misery,” he slurred, still holding his neck. “Nothingness would be favorable to this.”
“I know not what you mean,” I said, confused by his cold demeanor. As he started to fall over, I grabbed his shoulders to steady him. Drunkenness wasn’t all that had hold of him. No, something darker had its claws buried in his skin. “Where’s Paris?”
Paris could help me carry Galen to his quarters. I wasn’t overly familiar with the two men, but we had become well acquainted over the years, and I knew of their strong bond.
“Paris?” Galen slid to the grass and laughed without humor. “He’s fucking his new bride. A lot of help he’ll be to me now.”
An anchor dropped into my gut, and I plopped on the grass beside him in disbelief.
“His bride?”
“He said it was his duty to Sparta,” Galen whispered, tilting his head and staring at the sky. A beam of sunlight broke the horizon, chasing away the shadow of night. “A man must marry and give his wife children, so that he can have sons and daughters who’ll grow and make Sparta stronger.”
Tears glistened in his eyes, but they did not fall.
My heart ached for him. For both of them. It was a future I’d considered not long ago and had vowed not to think on again. However, putting it out of mind didn’t make the problem go away. Someday, Axios and I might face the same situation.
“Prepare yourself, Eryx,” Galen said in a cold, detached tone. “It matters not how greatly your heart longs for your warrior. If Sparta asks it of you, you must obey. There’s no place for men like us in this life. We come into this world alone, and that’s how we leave it. Our only saving grace is what we leave behind when we go.”