The force that had been charging our way halted and withdrew to the city gates. I made no sense of it. They had been moments from victory. Why were they retreating?
“Ery, what’s happening?” Axios regarded me with both fear and confusion.
I had no answer to give him.
Then, I saw it.
The Thracian king, Derdas, had charged with his cavalry directly at the gates. Teleutias had fallen in behind him with half amoraof infantry men.
A clever maneuver. It mattered not that the Olynthians had held the advantage on the battlefield. With our army blocking the gates, the enemy would be prevented from re-entering the city. It would also block further aid from inside the city.
Derdas and his force killed many of them as they retreated to safety. Cheers erupted in our ranks as the gates closed, and the battle ended. When I lowered my shield, I expected my arm to snap in two. It ached like it never had before. My brothers breathed heavily, all feeling the exertion of the fight.
I glanced at them, checking for wounds. Haden’s cheek bled from a shallow cut, but he was mostly untouched. A spear had sliced across Theon’s leg but didn’t appear to be deep. Quill had no visible wounds other than a few scrapes. All were safe.
“Let us return to Potidaea and celebrate our victory!” Teleutias exclaimed before ordering us to leave Olynthus.
Axios scoffed, and I didn’t need to ask what bothered him. The Spartan commander spoke of victory when so many of our men lay dead upon the ground—when we hadn’t achieved our goal of invading Olynthus.
My gaze fell to the wound in his shoulder, and my gut coiled upon seeing the amount of blood. It trickled down his bicep and gathered in the crease of his arm. I would tend to the wound when we returned to camp.
With his eyes on the field of dead men, Axios grabbed my hand. He cared not if men mocked our show of affection. Neither did I. After such a grueling battle when I hadn’t known if we’d live to see another day, I accepted the comfort of his touch and hoped it gave him solace in return.
Before we left, I stared at the dead warriors upon the ground. I had taken many lives that day. More than I could possibly count. Yet, I recalled nothing about the men apart from the need to kill them.
I remembered what Paris told me years ago.
“You will forget the color of their hair and the shade of their eyes. The only color you’ll know is red.”
I glanced at my bloodstained hands. What unsettled me most wasn’t that I had taken so many lives or that I was covered in my enemy’s blood. No. It was that I felt nothing at all.
***
If Axios didn’t behave, I was going to bite him. Though, I was sure he’d enjoy that.
“Sit still and let me look at it,” I growled as I grabbed him and forced him to sit back down on the bed. “You have lost a lot of blood.”
“It is only a shallow cut, Ery. Relax,” he said. When he flashed a too innocent smile—trying to play me for a fool—I continued to glare. He then sighed and stopped fighting me. “Very well.”
After we had returned to camp and took off our armor, we’d washed in the stream and ridded ourselves of the dirt and dried blood. We’d had a quick meal, though none of us had a real appetite. I had then procured cloth and a healing salve from the physician’s chambers to doctor his wound.
Our quarters were nicer compared to the barracks in Sparta. We sat upon a soft cushion and had a view of the city from the large window on the left side of the room.
As I focused on cleaning the wound, I sensed him smiling. He thought me overbearing with my protectiveness of him, yet he failed to consider how many men died not from the battle injury itself, but from the festering of it.
I knew he was hiding from me, though.
When I glanced up, I saw the shadows in his eyes. He had fought against me and behaved like a stubborn ass as a distraction from the horrors of battle. The wound in his mind was one I couldn’t clean and bandage. Not if he refused to talk about it.
“You do not have to hide your pain from me,” I whispered, after applying the salve and tying the cloth around his arm. “Perhaps from the other men… but never from me.”
Axios rolled his eyes. “The cut does not pain me, Eryx.”
“I am not referring to the cut,” I said, keeping my tone soft. “There is a shadow in your eyes, even now while you gaze upon me. We lost many men this day.”
A solemn expression crossed his face. “Do you think it ever becomes easier? War?”
I studied him as I considered my answer. Every man viewed war differently. Some shook with nerves and others jumped into the fray with a smile on their face. There was no yes or no answer.