Page 38 of Hensley Manor
Hearing about this Michael guy left a bitter taste in my mouth. He’d known Ian’s touch, felt Ian’s kisses. Had known his love. I hated him.
“You’re frowning.” Ian cupped my cheek. “You’re the one who asked.”
“I know.” I sighed and gently pushed his hand away. But before he could get the wrong idea, I looped my arm through his and stood against his side. “I just don’t like hearing about you loving someone else.”
“I didn’t love him.”
That sure as hell got my attention. My gaze moved to his face.
Ian continued, “As I was saying, we were the perfect couple in theory. But I didn’t love him. He didn’t love me, either. When I realized he’d fallen in love with someone else, I ended the engagement.”
“He fell in love with someone else? Really?”
Ian nodded. “I couldn’t be angry with him. He was never unfaithful to me, but another man had caught his eye. It was a man he worked with. What started as a conversation over drinks at a business dinner shifted into something more. For the both of them. So, I released him from our engagement so he could chase what his heart really wanted.”
“You’re much nicer than me. I would’ve kicked his ass.”
Ian’s laugh rumbled his chest. “I could never marry someone I didn’t love, Cole. Michael and I tried to make it work between us, we really did, but it started to feel more like a business arrangement rather than a romance. Our pieces didn’t fit together. We didn’t even belong to the same puzzle.”
“Does he and the home-wrecker still live here?”
“Behave.” He kissed my head. “And no, they don’t. He decided another location would better fit his company and moved shortly after we separated. Last I heard, they were married.”
“Does that upset you?”
The snow fell harder, no longer light flurries. I shivered and shoved my hands deeper into coat pockets.
“Let’s get you warmed up.” Ian led me to the car and opened my door before walking around and getting into the driver’s seat. He started the ignition and turned the heater on high. As the car warmed, we sat in silence.
I noticed he hadn’t answered my question.
He stared out the window, a pensive expression on his face. And then, “Honestly, a part of me was upset when hearing the news about Michael. But not for the reasons you’re thinking.”
“Then why?”
Ian turned to me in the seat, his brow drawn tight. “I was happy but sad, too. Not because I missed him, but because I never thought I’d find the kind of love he found. Each year, guests travel to the manor and, while they’ve become part of my family in a sense, it’s not the same. They leave at the end of their stay, and then it’s too quiet. I’m used to being on my own, but it’s becoming…lonely.” Blue eyes met mine, and he grabbed my hand. “Well, until you came along. I’m not lonely anymore.”
“You know, before meeting you I was miserable. I didn’t hate life. I just…” I paused, thinking on my words before saying, “I wasn’t happy. I didn’t really feel anything. And when Ididfeel, I liked to drink so I’d go back to being numb. It was becoming a dangerous cycle.” When I met his stare, my heart thrashed against my ribcage. “I guess what I’m saying is, I understand what you mean about being lonely. I’ve been lonely for years. I have my friend Lance, but like you said, it’s not the same.”
It was in that moment when I wondered if, perhaps, Ian could be my family. I quickly chased the thought away. I barely knew Ian. So what if I knew where he liked to be kissed and which spots made him weak in the knees? It didn’t matter if I knew how he liked his coffee and what side of the bed he liked to sleep on.
Then again…I felt like I’d never known anyone better.
“Do you still think this is a dream?” he asked.
Our fingers were linked, and I used my other hand to trace the curve of his knuckle. “You feel real to me.” I looked into his eyes, becoming lost in the blue swirls. “And when I’m with you, I feel alive. I don’t think a dream would be like that.”
He leaned over and kissed me then, and I melted into him. The spice of his skin drifted to my nose and his lips tasted like hot chocolate. Too real. I knew I could never dream anything—or anyone—as incredible as Ian. It just wasn’t possible.
“The night after we…” Ian blushed again. “Well, after we had sex for the first time. I had a dream where it wasn’t real. In the dream, you disappeared right in my arms, and I ran through the manor searching for you. I couldn’t find you anywhere. And for some reason, it terrified me. When I woke up the next morning with you still beside me, I couldn’t pull you into my arms fast enough.”
I’d woken that morning to him kissing me. Was that why? He’d been relieved?
“No worries,” I told him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
At least not yet.
When we returned to the manor, we went up to Ian’s room and shrugged out of our winter coats. I was freezing and my hands were pink. Ian took them between his and blew on my fingers, staring into my eyes.
