Page 46 of The Ghost of Ellwood
My body heated as he moved in closer.
And then his lips touched mine.
For a moment, I kissed him back. It just felt too good, and I’d been so lonely. But then Theo’s face appeared in my mind. I made a sound between a whimper and a groan before gently pushing Carter back a step.
“Carter, we talked about this.”
“I know,” he said, as tears welled in his eyes. “Sorry.”
He got into his car and slammed the door. I called after him, but he backed out of the driveway and sped off down the road to his house. Once his headlights disappeared, I put my hands in my pockets and walked back inside.
“You kissed him.”
Guilt clawed my chest. Theo stood in the archway leading to the parlor. I could barely meet his eyes.
“He kissed me,” I said.
“But you let him. You kissed him back. I saw you.”
“So?” Guilt-ridden and angry, I finally met his gaze. “I don’t see why it’s any of your business. You said it yourself…nothing can happen between us. I’ve made it clear that I want you, but you don’t wantme.What does it matter if Carter and I kiss? Hell, I might just fuck him too, if the urge strikes.”
Theo’s jaw loosened as his mouth popped open. “Ben…”
When he vanished, the crack in my chest that had formed earlier deepened.
“Theo?” I rushed forward, touching the spot he’d just been standing. It was colder than the area around it. He wasn’t there. I didn’t even feel him watching me. “You can’t run away when you get upset! Let’s talk about it.”
I waited for an answer that never came.
“You’re not being fair,” I tried again. “You push me away then get upset when another guy shows interest in me. Make up your damn mind.”
More silence.
Eventually, I went up the stairs and collapsed into bed, fully clothed.
Carter was crushing on me, and Theo…well, I was still trying to figure that one out. No matter what happened, someone would get hurt. One thing I hated about romance novels were the infuriating love triangles. And damn it all, I felt like I was stuck in one right now. I cared for Carter, but what I felt for Theo surpassed that.
I couldn’t be with the man I really wanted. Ishouldn’t wantto be with him. He was dead. A ghost. But no time or space could change my feelings for him. That much I knew.
“I’m so sorry, Theo,” I whispered to the dark room, hoping he was close enough to hear me.
The next morning, I opened my eyes to see Theo standing by the window. The silver light streaming in told me I’d been right about the rain. The soft thrumming of it could be heard against the windowpane.
I sat up in bed, and the rustling of covers—which I had somehow gotten under during the night—made him turn his head.
“Good morning.” His indifferent tone matched his expression.
“Morning.” The mattress dipped as I scooted toward the edge and stood up. “About last night…”
“No, you will stay silent and let me talk, Ben Cross.” Theo spun around and was in front of me within seconds. The indifference broke away like water bursting from a dam, and sadness radiated off him. “I know I cannot have you. I know it’s not fair for me to be hurting this way. But I do.”
I went to say something but snapped my mouth shut.
“I’ve been lonely for so many years, and I suppose finding you has made me feel less alone,” he continued. “Perhaps I’m mistaken, but I feel a bond between us. The weeks together have brought us close. Each morning, I eagerly wait for you to wake so we can begin our day. You’ve given purpose to my existence, Ben, and I fear losing what we have.” He paused, and his body flickered. “I fear losing you.”
Oh, my sweet, Theo.
“You won’t lose me. I told you, I’m not going anywhere.”
