Page 51 of Royal
Chapter 13
Royal
It was harder than I thought just to be Grayson’s friend. Every time I looked into his warm eyes or at his perfect lips, I had the urge to pull him to me and claim him as mine. But he wasn’t mine. Grayson couldn’t be tamed. Not that I wanted to tame him. Hell, I just wanted him to feel comfortable enough with me to let his true feelings show.
I could always read him. Even when he fought against me, like a bucking bronco refusing to let a rider on his back, I knew what he really felt. The glowers, snarls, and clenching of his jaw couldn’t fool me.
His outbursts and moments of indifference had no effect. I knew they were all show. But I shouldn’t have to chase him every step of the way to make a relationship work.
If he truly wanted to be with me, he’d grow a pair and make an effort to show it. Just telling me wasn’t enough.
Leaving him in the kitchen, I walked down the hall toward my room. I could’ve told him to go, but if I was being honest with myself, I felt safe knowing he was there.
It was much too early to sleep, so I turned on the TV and lay in bed. None of my favorite shows were on, so I went to the movie channels. Eventually, I heard steps in the hall, and my heart beat a little faster.
My bedroom door was open, but Grayson knocked on it anyway.
“Can I come in?” he asked.
I nodded and shifted over so he could join me on the bed.
“What are you watching?” He slid onto the mattress, keeping a few inches between us.
“A Spartan’s Honor,” I answered.
“I’ve seen this.” Grayson watched the TV as the first battle started. “Pretty good. Would’ve been better had it been a gay romance, though. Something likeAxios.Demetrius should’ve fallen for his best friend. You can totally see their chemistry. The writers chickened out.”
“I know, right?” I agreed with a light laugh. “Declan makes for a hot Spartan regardless.”
Kyler had made me and Brysen watch the movie with him probably a hundred times. He’d been such a fanboy of Declan, drooling over Declan’s abs and always talking about how he wanted to bend him over the bed and fuck him.
Dreams do come true.
I grinned at the thought.
“Not sure how I feel about you smiling at some other man’s sexy body,” Grayson playfully scoffed.
“I wasn’t smiling at him, you dork. Kyler’s dating Declan Price.”
“Oh, right!” Grayson crossed his arms and shuffled down on the bed, laying more beside me. “That was big news last year. Our station received a ton of calls complaining about reporters and paparazzi stalking people in town. Kind of cool that your friend is dating the biggest actor in Hollywood.”
“Yeah, it is.” I focused on the TV, trying to ignore how close Grayson was to me.
We were inches apart, but I felt the warmth coming off his body. No one had ever been as warm as him. I had poor circulation and was always cold. Grayson was always hot. We used to say that he was fire and I was ice. He’d even cracked a joke once that he was a werewolf and me a vampire.
Crazy goofball.
My heart squeezed in my chest. I missed what we once were. Missed how easy it was to fall into bed together and cuddle, to turn my head and be met with a kiss, just like he knew I wanted. I missed how we once talked so freely, without the cold barrier of betrayal and hurt between us.
People said you never got over your first love, and it was the damn truth.
When I glanced over at him, he was looking at me, too. And for once, his expression wasn’t guarded. The light from the TV cast a shadow over one side of his face. Yet, I saw the yearning in his eyes.
Grayson slowly inched toward me, his dark eyes flickering to my mouth. He stopped a hair’s width from my lips, and chills erupted across my skin. He was asking for permission without saying the words.
History showed it wasn’t the best idea to allow Grayson back into my life. He was too afraid of getting close to people. But, even if he had trouble saying the words, he had shown me so many times in the past that he loved me. He was a man who felt so much but buried it deep inside himself.
Through his many faults, he was still the only man I wanted to be with. The only one who’d ever claimed not only my heart but my very soul. It was why I’d never had a long-lasting relationship since him—why I’d become much like him and pushed other guys away when I sensed them getting too emotionally invested.
