Page 69 of Axios
The final stage in leaving boyhood was to find acceptance into a syssition—a group that consisted of fifteen members of the army and required us to not only dine together but to share a home with for many years. It helped forge bonds between us men and fostered loyalty.
Fortunately, we’d all been accepted into the same one; Eryx, Haden, Theon, Quill, and me.
Since we were no longer in theagoge, we had more time to ourselves. We still trained each day, but it wasn’t as it used to be with Gaius constantly looming over us and snarling like our very presence insulted him. It involved working on phalanx maneuvers and moving as one unit. Some days focused on strength training and others were basic drills.
Eryx and Haden continued to train their herds of boys, and I’d even been selected to teach alongside Eryx, just as Gaius and Felix had taught us together.
He and I worked well as a pair. Where he taught them survival skills and combat, I taught them pain endurance and how to be bold when faced with their doubts.
“Your mother came to speak with me,” Eryx said as we sat atop a hill at twilight after a long day on the field with the youths. Winter had passed, but a slight chill remained in the air with the setting sun. “I’ve been unsure of whether I should mention it, but I do not wish to keep it from you.”
“What was it she wanted?” I asked, keeping my gaze fixed ahead.
Shadow crept over the valley as the sun inched closer to the horizon and sunk below the peak of Mount Taygetus, and I watched as the golden light faded and surrendered to darkness.
The fact my mother had spoken to Eryx and not to me was of no surprise. She’d always favored him and did not hide her dissatisfaction that I was her son.
“Leanna and Haden are to be married,” he said moments later. There was no shock at the revelation. We all knew it would happen, and Haden had asked for my blessing before he decided to ask my sister. “Your mother wishes for me to convince Leanna to marry me instead. I would give her strong sons with sharp minds, she’d told me.”
I clenched my jaw, expecting nothing less from my darling mother.
Part of me wondered if she was so determined to have Eryx wed Leanna because she knew it would hurt me.
Once upon a time, she had perhaps cared for me, but as I’d grown, her attitude had changed. It wasn’t enough that I’d proven myself a warrior, that I’d excelled in theagogeand met every challenge. She’d expected more and wanted me to become a leader like Eryx.
“And what did you say to her?” I asked him, already suspecting he’d denied her wishes, but wanting to know anyway. I had such a curious nature.
“I agreed to her request,” he answered.
My breath caught in my throat at his response and it felt as if my heart had been crushed with a heavy boulder. I looked at him, bewildered and hurt.
Why would he do such a thing? Had I unknowingly wronged him? Or was it a revenge on me for my time spent with Agesipolis?
Then, I saw his smirk.
“You ass!” I exclaimed, punching his arm.
Eryx displayed his happiness at having tricked me. “Well, you should not be so gullible, Ax. Nor should you doubt me so.” He grew serious and grabbed my hand. “You are all I want in this world. How many times must I tell you for you to believe me?”
I held his stare before looking away, ashamed of myself. “Forgive me, Eryx. You took me off guard is all. I will not doubt you again.”
He released my hand and took hold of my chin, turning my face back toward him.
“No, it was cruel of me to even jest about,” he said with such sincerity that I saw it reflected in his eyes. “Your doubt is my doing for years ago when I spoke of marriage. I only hope with time, you’ll realize I will never leave you.”
I’d forgiven him long ago, and there was nothing more to discuss about it.
“What did you tell my mother?” I asked.
The indention appeared in his cheek as he smiled. “I told her I would not take Leanna, nor any other woman, as my wife for I already belonged to someone. When she inquired as to whom it was, I told her the truth. That I loved her son.”
My eyes widened. I wasn’t sure what shocked me more; that he’d told her about us or that he’d just confessed he loved me.
We’d declared our feelings for each other but had never utteredloveto explain those feelings. It was a word that invoked thoughts of romance and was not meant for the brutal lives of Spartan males.
Yes, I’d thought it on countless occasions—when he’d tell me his stories and I’d see the excitement light his eyes, when our lips touched in the midst of our passion, and when I’d lay in his arms while we slept—but I’d never expressed it aloud, knowing how out of place it was in a world such as ours.
And now he’s said it first.
