Page 55 of Tied to You

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Me: Are we still on for tomorrow?

Biker boy: Unless you still want me to leave you alone?

I’m surprised when he replies right away. I’m also surprised by his message. It cuts a little deep. I know he’s busy, but has he seriously kept some distance thinking that’s what I actually want? He said he was busy, that people were counting on him. Club business all day and all night? It must be draining. Maybe he’s just acting like a knob because he’s actually tired?

When I subtly asked Janette what he does at the club over dinner—my intrigue getting the better of me, all she said was the less we know the better. But if they knew me better, then they’d know that’s the worst thing she could have said. Because now, I want to know it all. It’s in my nature to find every scrap of information to have the full picture.

I’ve worked out enough to know it can’t all be strictly legal. The late nights. The partying. It’s a lifestyle I’ve heard about, but never really seen. Partying, yes. But meeting people in the dead of night? Criminals who don’t want to get caught do that.

What it is they actually do, though, I’m none the wiser. I have a feeling in my gut I’ll find out soon. I’m sure of it. Whether he tells me or I have to find out for myself, I will find out.

Grabbing the first dress I see and don’t actually hate, I make my way to the shoe department, picking some heels to match. Honestly, a spring, black tie wedding is lovely, but in a field when it will be freezing at night… the thought makes me shiver.

My phone pings when I’m at the till about to pay.

Biker boy: Your silence makes me think this is what you want? If I’m finished early enough later, I’ll swing by the house

I can’t contain the pang of misery that skates through me as I tap mycard to the machine whilst the lady behind the desk bags up my items. Swing by? Not stay? Just a fleeting visit. Haven’t heard from him in days, then suddenly twice in one day like it’s no big deal. It shouldn’t be a big deal. It’s not, in fact. But it still irritates me.

Me: Don’t worry. It’s a late one for me too. I’ll see you tomorrow

Biker boy: You never said you were busy tonight?

He’s a fine one to talk.

Me: You never asked

He must be thinking. The dots wiggle. Stop. Wiggle some more. Stop again. Then wiggle, and my phone pings.

Biker boy: What are you doing?

Me: I have to see some old friends

I see the dots wiggle, but then they stop. And they don’t start again. He won’t rise to it. I told him my friends aren’t interested in me, so he’ll probably be wondering what the hell I’m doing seeing them. Realising I don’t have a choice, I tuck my phone back in my bag knowing that after tonight, maybe things will be less complicated.

I just know I’ll want to bail. Even though I’ve been mentally preparing myself for seeing my dad and Henry, and everyone else in the fucked-up circle. I know my dad’s tactic will be to make me feel like I can’t live without him. Whatever he tries, I won’t give him the satisfaction of leaving early. Normally, I’d drink my way through it, but given I’m driving myself there because I don’t have a plus one, I’ll find my corner and ride out the bullshit.

I have to. I have to show him I can manage perfectly fine without him.

Happy birthday to me.

Once I have my bags, I grab myself a coffee then head to the farm. Janette is in the kitchen when I get back.

“Oh, show me what you got,” she practically sings.

I roll my eyes at her enthusiasm, but smile, dropping the bags to the table and pulling out the items.

“Mollie, that’s… that’s absolutely gorgeous.” She runs her hands over the satin material, seemingly lost in a trance. “No way you’re leaving the party alone.” She winks at me.

If only she knew the only person I would consider coming home with is her nephew. But, given there’s no chance of that tonight, I smile at her. “Yeah, that’s not going to happen,” I say on a laugh.

Janette looks up at me through her lashes, her hands pausing reaching into the bag to see my shoes.

I stop laughing.

“Oh? Somoneelsecaught your eye?” There’s hope in her voice.

My palms instantly turn clammy. Yeah, she knows I like Travis. I still won’t admit it though. I’ve barely admitted it to myself. “No,” I stammer. “I’m just taking this year to find out who I really am, that’s all. And if I should decide to date a man, I’ll make sure it’s on my terms.”