Page 38 of Twisted
“No, I wasn’t.”He holds my gaze and is about to say something when the waiter comes to our table.I order an appetizer, a salad, and a vegetable risotto that the chef is going to customize for me.
The food comes rather quickly and Xavier and I make small talk throughout the rest of dinner.Usually I hate the whole getting-to-know-you kind of chatter, but he is rather fascinating and I have so many questions about life in the 1400s.
We meet the photographer at the park after dinner.He touches up my makeup and gets right to work, telling us how to pose.I expect it to feel awkward and forced, but when Xavier puts his hand on my waist, something goes through me.
“Am I the first witch you’ve married?”I ask, causing him to smirk.
“You are the only human I’ve ever married,” he replies, and tucks my hair behind my ear.The camera clicks as the photographer walks around us, snapping pictures.
“Should I feel special?”
“Yes, but not because I married you.That was out of convenience.You should feel special because you are.”
Inhaling, I just hold his gaze, letting his words sink in.
“You are a witch, raised by demon hunters,” he continues, speaking softly so we’re not overheard.Unlike vampires, witches, shifters, and demon hunters don’t want to be known by the general public.“Yet there is a softness to you.I see the way you look at things.You haven’t let the Order turn you bitter.You want to believe there are good people in this world.”
“There are good people.And bad.But we can be good,” I say, trying to convince myself that I am good.
“Are you sure about that?”he asks as the wind blows.I instinctively step closer to him and his arms clasp around me.
“Yes.And we can all be redeemed.”
“Some of us…” He looks away.“Some of us may have gone too far.”
“No.I don’t believe that.Even you can be redeemed.”
“I’m no good,” he says quietly, deep voice rattling right through me.“I’ve done a lot of bad things and I don’t regret it.”
“I know,” I whisper back.My lips part as I look into his dark blue eyes and he leans in.Slowly, moving inch by inch.Everything fades around me and, for the first time in my life, I feel completely seen.If anyone could look at me knowing the things I did before, the way I let myself get pushed around and used by the Order, and not judge me…it’s Xavier.
He’s been alive for nearly seven hundred years.He’s killed and fucked his way through his afterlife, I’m sure, and the Malus family doesn’t have the reputation it does by being reasonable people.
I know exactly who Xavier is.
Maybe there’s something wrong with me for not balking and wanting to figure out a way to stake him in his sleep.Yet for some reason, he’s not like the Order members who kill anyone who’s different.
My heart leaps in my chest and Xavier brings a hand up, cupping my chin.My pulse increases and warmth floods through me, reminding me that Xavier said he can tell the difference between my heart speeding up out of fear and my pulse increasing because I’m getting turned on.
And right now, it’s the latter.
Everything inside of me is being pulled to him, and desperation to feel his body against mine starts to take over.A tingle runs down my spine, all the way to between my legs.Holy shit.He’s had years and years—centuries—of pleasing women.Vampires in general are said to be great lovers, and I want more than anything to find out just how good Xavier is.
It’s more than that, though.I won’t have to hold back.I won’t have to worry about accidentally sparking him with magic.He won’t push me away out of fear, call me a freak, or even be hurt by it.He’ll heal instantly, and I can fully let go.
“Xavier,” I start, but my voice dies in my throat as he puts his lips to mine.I melt into him, hands landing on his waist.He pulls me closer and I arch my back, pushing my hips into his.
“Perfect!”the photographer exclaims, and I blink a few times, feeling like I need to reorient myself to the here and now.Because for a moment there, I had totally forgotten everything else around me.
I wasn’t thinking about the way the Russos betrayed me.I wasn’t thinking about how much I hate Xavier and want to find a way to escape.I wasn’t thinking about the pain Ryder caused me or how I’ll never feel anything for another person ever again.
And I wasn’t even thinking about how Devon is stirring something inside of me, how looking at him is like looking at a mirror and I want nothing more than to comfort him and help him find his place because in doing so, I’m also finding a place for me.
No, in that moment, only Xavier existed.And fuck, I want to go back to that moment.Because I’ve never felt so seen before in my life.And not just seen, but understood and respected for what I am.
A witch, raised by demon hunters.I’m a skilled assassin, better than anyone I get assigned to go out with and yet I’ve been treated differently—as less than just because I’m different.My differences should have been celebrated, or at the very least recognized for making me a better hunter.
I can just hear Larissa’s voice in my head now, trying to chastise me and tell me that I think I’m better than everyone and me trying to explain to her that just because I’m more skilled doesn’t mean I’m fundamentally a better human being.It takes emotional intelligence to differentiate between the two, and Larissa, and most of the world probably, is lacking.
