Page 53 of Your Fan Forever
"I've never been so scared in my life." He tilted his head. "I just keep thinking if I lost you before I could tell you, showyou..."
"Hey," I unfolded his arms and wrapped them around my waist. "You didn't lose me. I'm not goinganywhere."
"Callie." He turned away and went over towards the bed and plopped down. He sat with his head in his hands. "We have to talk about it sometime. Before we dothis."
I held on to the door, ran my hand down the smooth paintedwood.
"I want to be with you, but I can't live up to what every fantasy you have in your brain about what our life is supposed to belike."
I narrowed myeyes.
"Our life ... it's going to be amazing, but it's not always celebrity weddings and dream vacations and traveling the world all thetime."
He stood up and came toward me. He grabbed my face. "Most of the time, it's like we are at home. You know, real life. I don't want to wake up in a few years and hear that I've bored you totears."
"Noah," I grabbed his hands and held them in mine. "I don't have some fantasy built up about us or any delusions about our life together. If anything, I was afraid you were getting bored withme."
"Why would you thinkthat?"
"I can't drop everything and go jet setting with you and your famous friends." I turned toward the bathroom. "I'm not going to be this glamozon who looks perfect all the time and acts perfect all thetime."
"I never said I wantedthat."
"You never said you didn't either." I caught his reflection in the mirror. "The truth is I've never been in love before. I don't know what the expectationsare."
"Well, that's good." He walked up and stood nest to me. We both stared in the mirror at each other. "I've never been in love either. I've no clue what it's supposed to belike."
"How are supposed to do this if neither of us have a clue?"I shrugged myshoulders.
"You're a writer, can't you write it up and let meknow."
"What I wrote in the past has us in this weird head space. I don't think that's a goodidea."
"Maybe we need to write something together." Noah held out his hand. I took it and laced my fingers betweenhis.
"Where do we start?" Iasked.
"We need a good hook." Noah rubbed hischin.
I brought his hands up to my lips and kissed it. "How do two people who have no clue aboutlove..."
"Turn it into forever love." Noah added. “That's hotCaliente."
"Yeah itis."
Noah pulled me into his arms and held my face. He stared into my eyes for a minute, taking me in. Confirming what I knew deep down. He loved me and wanted me to feel hislove.
He placed a soft kiss on mylips.
My toes tingled. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my body into his. He deepened the kiss. His urgency matched his eagerness to show me how he felt. In a way he couldn't say withwords.
I felt lighter. More free, knowing all of my insecurities and doubts he had them too. One thing we knew was that we wanted to be together. We had the rest of our lives to work the restout.
Noah hugged me to him and kissed down mycheek.
"We have togo."
I groaned. Forgetting about the doctor'sappointment.
