Even now, when my heart beats like crazy and embarrassment floods my body, I still feel safest beside Dmitri. His skin warms and soothes me.
“What’s wrong, Oskar?”
“I’m embarrassed.”
He smooths my hair and tucks some strands behind my ear. “You shouldn’t be.”
“But you’ve been with so many people.”
“Is not bad to want more from people,” he says. “Is good quality, Oskar. Besides,” his voice lowers to a super sexy rumble, “I can teach you everything.”
“You’ve never slept with a guy,” I say.
“I’ll figure it out.”
I raise an eyebrow.
“I’m good with my body.”
I snort. “You probably would be incredible at it.”
Dmitri’s chest puffs out. “I know.” He kisses my temple. “You will be too. We’ll both be new at it together.”
“It’s not that easy.” I try to be stern, but I feel a smile bubbling through me despite my best efforts to restrain it. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Only with you,” Dmitri promises. “I’ll make you an expert in bed. And when you meet the man you’re really supposed to be with, you won’t be embarrassed.”
Something in his voice is wistful, but when I glance at him, he meets my eyes and smiles.
Maybe I imagined his tone.
“This sounds like a bad idea,” I say.
He shrugs. “Maybe we can take up boardgames instead.”
My nose wrinkles, and he chuckles against me.
“Is your choice, Oskar,” Dmitri says.
“But you’re straight. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me—”
“I don’t feel sorry for you,” he says.
“But I’ve never—”
He places a finger over my lips. “You are smart and handsome and well-educated and have an amazing family. You don’t have a career that’s about to end in approximately ten days.”
“But—”
“I would be absolutely lucky to make man-on-man love with you.”
“No one calls it that.”
“See, you’re already teaching me.” He pinches my cheek. “And if we don’t like it, we stop. No questions asked.”
I scrunch my lips together and stare into the middle distance.
“You can’t tell me you’re not curious.”