Page 33 of How We End
“I’ll call you a car.”
“No.I won’t need it.”End this now,my head screamed.Nothing good would come of this.“It’s probably best if we… um, if I…” I stayed on the bed a moment longer, still hoping something might shift.But the truth was always going to be the same.He was a hockey star.And I was someone he should never be seen with.
Julian pulled out his phone, texting someone.“There, done.”
“What’s done?”
“I paid you.Now let me call you that car.”
“Julian, that’s not fair to you.”I dug my phone out, ready to reverse the charges, when he grabbed it.
“I’m not going to have you end this because you think I wanted a freebie.I’d pay more if you asked.Now, can we move on?”
“I…” I wasn’t sure I could mess this night up any more than I already had.“This can’t…"
“No.”He pressed a finger to my mouth.“Not another word.I’m going to call a car, and then I will wait with you,” he said, reaching for the phone.
“I’ll take an Uber.”
“Cassidy.I’m not going to let you get into some Uber on Halloween at two in the morning.I’m not that guy,” he said, putting the receiver to his ear.“This is Julian Silver.I need a car.Yes, now.Thank you.”He hung up the phone, grabbing his jacket.“Ready.”
“Don’t do this.”I pressed a hand to his chest.“If anyone recognizes you…”
“They won’t, but if they do, so what?”He took my hand.
“So what?If people find out what I am and that I’m with you… well, it will be bad, for you.”The media was full of these examples.People’s careers and lives ruined because of some moral code they violated.Adultery.Paying for sex.Falling in love with the wrong person.
“It might be a nice change.Now all they remember me for is who my father is.Or how badly I played.All the goals I missed.The guy that paid a very beautiful woman to suck his cock might be nice.”
“I haven’t done that.”I frowned, realizing I hadn’t.
“If you stay the night, I’ll let you tie me up and you can suck it all you want.”
I laughed.“As tempting as that sounds…” And it really did sound tempting, the cock-sucking and spending the night with him.
“Cass, my life has been splashed across the headlines since I was fifteen and started playing in the CHL.They cannot say anything I haven’t already heard.”
“Have they said you were paying for sex?”I shivered as the air conditioner kicked on.
“Yes.”He stepped away and dug through the duffel bag on the floor, then pulled out a sweatshirt, smelling it.“Here, it’s clean-ish.”
“I’m fine.”My teeth chattered, not from the cold but the roller coaster of emotion I was feeling.
“Would you just put it on?”He walked over and tugged it over my head.
I slipped my arms in.It was warm and smelled like him.
“A little big, but it will cover up all that.”He motioned to my chest, pulling me into his embrace.“Once some teammates and I went to a strip club.I got a lap dance.Not my idea.But someone took a couple of photos.”
“A lap dance is pretty minor,” I said, looking up at him.
“I was drunk and barely seventeen.And that wasn’t the last time an unflattering photo of me turned up on the internet.There were a few other drunken escapades when I was nineteen and twenty.And twenty-one and twenty-two.Then the whole thing with Shaw this summer.”He frowned at me.“My nickname for a long time was ‘Tarnished Silver,’ among other things.There’ve been rumors I have a substance and alcohol addiction.My coach thinks I’m doping, and you can’t Google my name without some controversy coming up.So paying for sex is another thing to add to the list.”He stepped away, grabbing his wallet and pulling on a jacket.“Ready?”He reached for the door.
“I’m sorry,” I said as he opened the door.For tonight and all the other nights.For the times people had let him down.
“For what?”He took my hand as we walked to the elevator.
His hair was a mess and the makeup on his jaw was smeared.“I know what it’s like to have your mistakes always thrown back in your face.”
