Page 7 of The Forgotten Life of Ella Moon
Thane stepped into the shadows. “Ishall take it here in my room, please.Ishall take all my meals in my room.”
Her chest tightened with his sadness. “Idon’t know who you are looking for.Butshe is very lucky to have someone looking for her.”
“She should’ve never gotten lost.”
“Perhaps she is unaware she’s lost.”Ellapaused at the door.
“Maybe.”Thanedidn’t look at her. “OrmaybeI’mtoo late.”
“I shall have your dinner brought up.Goodnight,Mr.Tenebris.”Ellapulled the door shut, leaving the handsome stranger with his memories and a dress.
CHAPTER4
ELLA
Dinner had been served and the dishes cleaned.Mrs.AandLillianhad retired for the night, givingEllathe freedom to slip away.Shemade her way down a narrow, muddy path through the long grass and passed the large oak.Overthe rock foundation from a long-forgotten barn and to the place where she had been born intoRiverton.Herspot by the river.Theblanket she’d tucked in the branches of a willow the night before was still there.Ellaspread it out and lay back, watching the sky turn to dusk through the branches.Thiswas her favorite time of the day.Sheclosed her eyes, letting dusk float across her skin.
Her thoughts wandered back to the man in room six.Thane.Inall her time inRiverton, she had never had such strong feelings for someone.Noteven forWilliam.Andit was more thanThane’slooks.Hewas handsome; there was no doubt about that.Butthere was something else.
Being around him made her feel as if she had forgotten something, like a latch on a gate or a candle still burning.Butwhen she went back to right those wrongs, she couldn’t remember what they were.Itwas unnerving and made her world feel a bit off-center.
But that was tomorrow’s problem.Williamwas near.
She felt him before she heard his familiar footfalls.Hepressed his lips to hers.Hiskiss was warm and full of a young hunger.Hewas a year her senior, and yetEllafelt as if she had lived a lifetime more than him.Shekissed him back, desperate to erase the incomplete feelingThaneTenebrisleft her with.
“You will let me kiss you but not court you?”Williamwhispered as he kissed her neck.
“Would you rather court me?”Shetugged at his hair.Williamwas not a gate left unlatched.Hewas simple and uncomplicated.Hedid not make her world seem unbalanced.Orlike she had forgotten something.ButWilliamalso felt like a decay.Perhapsthat was too harsh of a word.Butwhen she was with him, she felt like part of her was dying.UnlikeThane, who felt like hope.Belonging?No, that couldn’t be.
William lifted his head. “Can’tIdo both?”
“No, because then we couldn’t sneak away like this.”Ellatraced his jawline.Itwas easy to be with him.Towatch the way his lean muscles flexed under her fingertips.Tohear the way his breath caught when they were together.Butthere was no deep longing when they were apart.Nopassion.AndEllabelieved she had felt it once.Orat least she thought she had.
William lay down next to her. “Ifwe married, we could do both.”Hetucked a piece ofElla’shair behind her ear.
Ella let his words float away in the evening air.Williamhad mentioned marriage plenty of times, but she had never let herself think about what that meant.Whather life would look like.Butmaybe she should. “Whatwould we do if we married?”
“I’d love you.”Hesmiled.
“William.Wecannot pay our debts with love.”Andwhat would it mean if she didn’t love him?Couldshe learn that?Moreimportantly, was it something she could live without until the end of her days?
“We would take over the mill.I’dwork, and you’d help.”Williamsaid it as if that was common knowledge.
“And ifIdon’t want that?”Shehad never told him what she wanted because he had never asked.Williamwas so eager to get to the end that he forgot about all the moments in between.Andthose were the moments that were harder than the beginning or the end.Inthe beginning love was new and easy, and by the end, well, everyone was just tired.
“Okay, tell me what my beautiful wife would like.”
Ella thought for a moment. “Agrand room with gold walls and a ceiling painted to look like the sunrise.”Ellasmiled up at the night sky that peeked through the willow branches. “Anda maid.No, three, soInever have to wash a dish or launder a shirt again.Anda cook that will make the most delicious sweets.Onesthat will melt on your tongue.That’swhatIwould like.”
William went quiet.
Ella looked over at him.Hecould never give her that.Hissadness made her feel guilty for wanting something more than this hard life. “Itwas just a silly thought.”Shedidn’t even know where these thoughts came from.
“I can’t give you that.ButIcan promise to love you until the end of my days.Tolove and provide for you and our children.Andif you want to paint our bedroom ceiling all the colors of the sunrise,I’llhold the ladder for you.Wewill be happy.Ipromise.”
Ella sadly smiled as her silly dream vanished like a wish. “Okay.”Theylay there listening to the river.Theywatched as darkness crawled out from the woods; its cool fingers felt like a lover’s caress.
“It’s not enough, is it?You’venever said you wanted such things.”Williamdidn’t look at her.
