Page 34 of The Forgotten Life of Ella Moon
“So haveI.Canwe talk?Please.Ipromise to not say anything stupid.”
“Yes, meet me by the river.”
“Okay.”Williamdisappeared down the overgrown trail.
Thane and the woman were arguing by his carriage.He’dtry to speak with her if she didn’t leave now.Andshe’d believe every word that came out of that perfect mouth.Ellauntied her apron and pulled open the kitchen door. “Ineed some air.Don’twait up.”Inthe sky, gray storm clouds blocked out the weak sun.Shequickly made her way down the worn path to the large willow tree.
William leaned against it, pulling leaves from a branch.Hewas the opposite ofThane.Williamwas a warm spring shower, the type that brought new life, whileThanewas a summer storm.Onethat brooded all day, filling the sky with dark clouds.Itcould blow over, leaving those in its path to take a careful breath of relief.Orhe could strike, destroying all those around him.Andwhich type of stormEllawanted to survive was what tore at her heart.
“William,Ithink?—”
“Don’t.”Hestepped closer to her. “Letme say whatIcame here to say.”Williamtook her hands in his.Heran his thumb over each bone of her finger. “BeforeImet you,Ididn't believe in love.Ithought the bestIcould do was to find someone who would make a good partner and mother for my children.Thatwe, like my parents, would grow to love each other.”Helooked up at her, his brown eyes full of hope. “ThenImet you.AndnowIknow love is real.Iknow it’s hard to believe me afterIsaid those horrible things.Andif you never want to speak to me again,I’dunderstand.But?—”
“Hush.Weboth said things we didn’t mean.”Ellapressed a finger to his lips.Shehad been wrong too.Shemay have never askedWilliamto love her, but she had never told him not to either.Shehad depended on him for so many things.He’dbeen by her side for the past year.Heheld her hand the first timeAilithsent her to market.Hedried the tears she sometimes cried for no reason.Hewas the constant in her inconstant life.Thanewas chaotic and the unknown.Andshe thought that was what she wanted, but it was not what she needed.Sheneeded the safetyWilliampromised.
William took her hand. “Youhave everything to offer.It’sme who doesn’t have much.Itwas selfish of me to assume you would want to stay here.Themill was my dream.Notyours.”Williamlooked up at her, the truth shining bright in his eyes. “Youmean more to me than the mill or any job.Ifyou want, we will leaveRivertonand go anywhere.We’llfind a life that feels right.Forboth of us.Idon’t want you to feel trapped.”
“You’re not trapping me.”Thepast had trapped her.Trappedher into believing that there was something worth remembering.Allthe strings she thought were connecting her to her past were doing nothing more than strangling her.
William cupped her cheek. “Idon’t want you to feel likeI’myour only choice.Iwant you to marry me because you want to.”
“Yes.”Ellaanswered the question before he could ask it.
“Yes, what?”
“I’ll say yes.I’llmarry you.”Thelast string of her forgotten life pulled tight.Shecould feel the fibers pulling free.
William took a deep breath. “Youwill?”
The blood pounded in her ears.Thiswas it.Theend. “Yes.”Thelast string snapped.Allher hopes and dreams bled out, leaving her empty and defeated.
William caught the tears that fell.Theydidn’t sparkle on his scarred fingers. “Whythe tears then?”
“I don’t know.”Theycould be for what lay in her future or for the loss of her past.
“It’s okay.Wedon’t have to have all the answers right now,”Williamwhispered, pulling her into his embrace.Hekissed the top of her head and let her rage like the storm around them.Shesobbed into his chest, clinging to his warmth and the beating of his heart.Thiswas the life she deserved, not the lieThanehad tried to sell her.Notthe miseryAlbertpromised.Aquiet life withWilliam.
The sorrow eased from her chest and body with each tear she shed.Soonthere was nothing left.Shesat curled up inWilliam’slap, listening to the rain fall gently around them. “I’msorry.”
William rested his cheek on the top of her head. “Youhave nothing to be sorry for.Whateverit is, we will figure it out.Okay?”
She nodded.
“I love you,” he whispered.
Ella closed her eyes, letting his words burn onto her skin.Justsay the words.Sayyou wish.IwishIcould say the words.Shesat up, hoping to find a reason not to say it back.Butshe only found his warm brown eyes and his love. “Ilove you too.”Thewords slipped from her mouth before her lips could form them.
William cupped her face. “Doyou truly?”
Ella couldn’t lie twice.Shejust nodded, running her thumb over his bottom lip.Shewould learn to love him.Hewas handsome, caring, loving.He’dsacrifice the world for her.Ellamoved, straddling him and then undoing the laces of his trousers.Heplaced fiery kisses on her neck and mouth as he pushed her skirt up.
Her cries were covered up by the thunder that shook the world around them.Shedidn’t let her mind try to unravel how messed up this was.Thatshe usedWilliam’sdesire to cover her pain.Butit was all she had right now.
The storm that raged around them was nothing like the storm that raged inside of her.
CHAPTER17
ELLA
