Page 47 of Regancy & Savior
“Yes, princess?” I asked, glancing down at her.
“Do you miss home? You know, with Pop-Pop?”
“Yes. Do you?” I questioned.
She nodded. “But I like it here too. I love Bernard, Granny, Uncle Mil, Tete, Savior, an?—”
“So what’s the problem, baby girl?”
“There isn’t one I don’t think. I just don’t know which home I love the most.” She shrugged.
“You can love both of them equally or one more than the other, but you’ll never have to choose.”
“Okay, but can we get out of this sand, Mommy? It’s getting between my toes.”
I laughed. “I thought you liked that feeling.”
“I was like seven, and I thought it was cool,” she responded, looking up at me.
“Girl, bye. You’re only eight.”
“And I’ll be nine next month. Wait, isn’t your birthday next week, Mommy?” Leave it to her to remind me that I was getting another year older when I already felt old.
“Oh shoot. You are gonna be nine, my little Leo. What do you want for your birthday this year?”
“Ummm…” She dramatically put her finger to her chin as she looked up to the sky with a big smile on her face. “I don’t know, Mama, surprise me.” She was the silliest child and my little best friend.
“Well, I heard that you told somebody that you wanted a new phone,” I responded, referring to her telling Savior that she wanted the newest iPhone in pink.
She nodded. “That’s my gift from Save. He doesn’t know me like you do, so I had to tell him what I wanted.”
I laughed.
“Right. I’m you, and you’re me, Mama. So you know what I want already.” She smiled.
I swear that child never ceased to amaze me. We walked the beach for a while longer before we went to eat. She chose the restaurant, so we ended up at The Cheesecake Factory. That was by far her favorite restaurant only because she loved cake and stuff. I watched her order, and all I could do was study her in awe. Kale was my everything from the moment she slid out of me weighing eight pounds even. She was what put the color back in my life after everything that I had gone through. No matter how hard my father tried, he just couldn’t, but the moment I held her, I breathed again. I had gone through my entire pregnancy not breathing because I couldn’t get over what happened to me, and I couldn’t imagine having a child that I resented because of it. I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to love her the way she needed me to. The moment I laid eyes on her, it was the complete opposite. Kale was my everything in one person. Hell, she and I grew up together if I really thought about it. I didn’tknow anything about being a mother, but for her, I figured it out with the support of my father. For my girl, I became what she needed, and I never regretted it. However, I did know the difficult conversation of her father was would be coming, and it was unavoidable. I just hoped that I had the right words to soothe her questions. The funny thing was, I couldn’t imagine going through the toddler days all over again, but I guess I signed up for them.
I sat at my mother’s table, looking at her as she stood over the stove making me a plate that I definitely didn’t ask for. She claimed that I was looking thin. I disagreed totally because I was off my diet and feeling much heavier. Never mind the fact that I found out why I was feeling a little heavier.
“Baby girl, you work so much that I never see you.”
I nodded. “I just want to make sure if I ever have to take some time away from the bar, that it’s good and nothing is lacking.”
She turned around with the bowl of cabbage and smiled at me. “You are so much like your father that it scares me. A practical thinker and workaholic. You work so much planning for tomorrow until you forget to live for the day.”
I nodded. It was the same spiels she gave me every time I came over.
“Have you thought about settling down with that Savior fella?”
“What do you mean settling down?” I asked.
“You know marriage, kids, and th?—”
“I like him if that’s what you’re asking, and we work.”Plus, I’m pregnant.
“You know your bio?—”
“After I had Kale, the doctor told me that I’d possibly never be able to have children again.” Once that sentence left my lips, she immediately reached for my hand.
