Page 50 of Run, Run, Roommates
And there’s an envelope stuffed with pictures of Joe. Marco thumbs through them, blinking back tears. Sometimes it’s Joe by himself—I particularly like the one in front of the New York Public Library where Joe impersonates one of the lions—but more of them are with Marco or Drew.
“We have time,” I say, “if you want to make some ornaments now. I have a couple hours before I leave for Eva’s party. Although . . . are you sure you don’t want to come with me?” I’d asked Marco weeks ago, and he’d declined the invitation. It’s at Eva’s parents’ house, and it’s a white elephant gift exchange with a bunch of her friends and family.
Marco hesitates, glancing at the picture in his hand. Joe’s sitting on Santa’s lap, blowing the camera a kiss.
“I’m sure Eva would be happy to have you,” I wheedle.
“Eva or you?”
“Both, of course.”
“All right, I’m in.”
I clap my hands together. “Good. Let’s make ornaments and then we’ve got to run and get you a present though. Nothing too expensive, and the weirder the better. Come on!”
26
Marco
Brin was not kidding about the white elephant gift needing to be weird. I was nervous sitting down around the tree with Eva’s friends, knowing what I’d brought to the party.
Now that it’s my turn, though, three gifts have been opened and two have already been stolen. Neither of them are the gifts Brin or I brought—there’s a bag of miniature rubber ducks, a resin toilet seat with flowers encased in it, and a pack of Jane Fonda workout VHS tapes.
Eva’s nineteen-year-old cousin hadn’t known what they were, which made me feel every one of my thirty-two years.
That’s what I’m choosing between, or one of the many presents that sit unopened under the tree.
I lean into Brin. “Do you have a particular attachment to any of the open ones?”
She bats her eyelashes at me. “’Cause you’d steal it for me?”
“Hell yes.”
“Hmm.” She taps her chin and looks thoughtfully at the pile. There are twenty of us here, so there’s a lot to choose from. Some of the gifts are fairly innocuous looking, like the two we brought, but some of them are wonky shapes.
Like the dick-and-balls-shaped one wrapped in green paper with a bow at the tip. Surely it’s not actually a sex toy?
Well, there’s only one way to find out.
Laughter fills the room when I grab the “penis” by the tip. Right away it feels vaguely familiar, but it barely weighs anything, so I doubt it’s an actual dildo.
The whole room quiets while I open it. As I suspected, it’s not a sex toy, but instead is an inflatable cylinder that says “Go Wildcats” and two poop-emoji stress balls. I wave the cylinder around and realize it’s a thunder stick.
“A-plus for the packing effort,” I say to the group.
“Thank you.” Eva tosses her hair over her shoulder. I gently bonk her in the head with it.
Two turns later, someone steals from me and I have to go back to the drawing board.
Once I’ve made my choice and unwrapped a gently used game of Guess Who?, which the gift bringer modified to have pictures of KPop Demon Hunters characters instead of the normal people, Brin hops up from her spot next to me to use the bathroom.
Eva sidles in to take her place. When we walked into her apartment holding hands, Eva didn’t bat an eye, just started introducing us around. Even now she doesn’t have to say anything, she just looks at me smugly.
“You’re not surprised,” I say.
“No.” She takes a sip of her chocolate mint martini. “I knew the first time you came to the bar late at night to walk her home that you two were gonna end up together.”
That must have been ages ago. I don’t even remember the first time I walked home with her. It doesn’t happen all that often—only when I’m out late enough either with Greg or with William.
