Page 11 of Total Carnage
"Hey there, handsome," she purred, leaning in close, her voice begging him to fuck her. "Why don't you ditch the little girl and let me show you a real good time?"
Vin's face hardened, but before he could say a word, I was there. I grabbed a fistful of her bleached hair and yanked. Hard.
"Back the fuck off, bitch," I snarled, my voice dripping venom. "He's mine."
She stumbled, eyes wide with shock, then narrowed. "You little cunt," she spat, lunging at me.
We crashed into a table, glasses shattering. I felt her nails rake across my cheek, drawing blood. Adrenaline surged through me as I slammed my fist into her jaw.
"Raven!" Vin's voice cut through the chaos, but I was too far gone.
We rolled on the dirty floor, a tangle of limbs and fury, flailing through blood, beer, sweat, and dried come. I tasted copper as her elbow caught my mouth. Growling, I drove my knee into her stomach.
"I'll fucking kill you," I hissed, seeing nothing but red.
She clawed at my face, but I was stronger, fueled by a possessive rage I'd never felt before. I slammed her head against the floor, once, twice...
"Enough!" Vin's arms wrapped around me, pulling me off her. I struggled against him, still seeing red.
"Let me go!" I screamed, my whole body shaking. "I'll teach that whore a lesson she'll never forget!"
The bitch scrambled to her feet, blood trickling from her split lip. Her eyes were wild, darting between me and Vin. She lunged forward, grabbing an empty bottle from the bar.
"Fuck you both!" she shrieked, swinging it at my head.
I ducked, the glass shattering against the wall behind me. Before I could think, I was on her. My hands found her throat, squeezing. We stumbled backwards, crashing through the back door into the alley. Vin tried to come out but I closed the door and jammed the lock. The cool night air hit my face, but I barely noticed. All I could see was her, all I could feel was the rage pulsing through my veins. Her back slammed against the brick wall, her eyes wide with fear now.
"I told you," I snarled, my face inches from hers. "He's. Fucking. Mine."
With each word, I slammed her head back. The last hit was different. A sickening crack echoed through the alley. Her body went limp, sliding down the wall, leaving a dark smear on the bricks.
I staggered back, my breath coming in ragged gasps. She didn't move. Vin banged on the door, but I just stared at the woman, my eyes darting to the dumpster across the alley. Seeing the door wouldn’t hold any longer, I dragged her across the alley and used every last bit of strength to shove her into the dumpster, tossing in bags of trash over top her dead body.
My hand trembled as I wrote the words, the pen scratching across the paper. Fuck. I'd never told anyone about that night, not even Vin. Part of me felt lighter like I'd finally set down a burden I'd been carrying for years.
But then the fear crept in. What would Vin think if he knew? Even dead, the thought of his judgment made my stomach churn. Would he look at me differently? See me as a monster?
"Christ, Vin," I muttered, running a shaky hand through my hair. "I did it for us. To protect what we had."
I stared at the words I'd just written, feeling the weight of that night settle over me again. It was the moment everything changed—the moment I truly became one of them.
"Fuck it," I said, tossing the pen aside. "This is who I am now." I leaned back in my chair, memories flooding back. It all felt so right, so fucking perfect. "You saw it, didn't you, Vin?" I whispered to the empty room. "You knew I belonged before I did."
I closed my eyes, remembering the way he looked at me after that night. There was no judgment, no disgust. Just understanding, and something else—pride. "Jesus, what a pair we made," I laughed bitterly. "A president’s daughter and an outlaw biker. Who'd have thought?"
The laughter died in my throat as reality crashed back in. Vin was gone, and I was left with the consequences of the life we chose. "Was it worth it?" I asked myself, my voice barely audible. "All the blood, the violence, the constant looking over our shoulders?"
I stood up abruptly, pacing the small room. My fingers itched for a cigarette, but I resisted the urge. Instead, I punched the wall, welcoming the sharp pain that shot through my knuckles.
"Fuck!" I yelled, the sound echoing off the bare walls. "What am I supposed to do now, Vin? How do I live with this?" The silence that followed was deafening. I slumped against the wall, sliding down until I was sitting on the cold floor.
"I don't regret it," I said finally, my voice steadier. "Not the life, not us. Not even her. But Christ, sometimes I wish I could go back. Tell that naive little rich girl what she was getting into."
I laughed again, but there was no humor in it. "Who am I kidding? I'd do it all again in a heartbeat."
I dragged myself back to the desk, pen hovering over the paper, my hand steadier, resolve hardening like concrete in my veins. "I ain't gonna let this break me, Vin," I muttered, scribbling furiously. "You taught me better than that. This life, our life—it’s in my blood now. Can't wash it out, don't want to."
The words flowed faster, my script growing messier with each line. I'll keep ridin', keep fightin'. For you, for us, for everything we built. Ain't no one gonna take that from me. I paused, memories of Vin's crooked grin and strong hands flooding my senses. "Fuck, I miss you," I whispered, a single tear splashing onto the paper. "But I swear, I'll make you proud. Live hard, die free—just like you always said."
