Page 25 of Wicked Salvation
The rage bursts like a dam.
“Yeah, I was in a fight with yourfuckingfiancé.” I toss one of the vases from off the mantle above the fireplace to the floor. She flinches as it shatters, just like my fucking heart. I feel terrible, but the rage... “I let myself trust you, Eden.”
Her eyes widen, brimming with tears.
I’m not falling for that again.
“I had to say yes, Lucian,” she blubbers. “And that was all before I talked to you last night. If we had spoken before?—”
“But we did talk before, Eden!” I shout. I’m absolutely shaking with rage, anxiety, sadness—every fucking emotion. “You came here, you let me fuck you, andyou knew you were engaged,” I hiss. “I know you don’t think very highly of me but I don’t fuck people in relationships. Fucking you last night was a moment of weakness, but I explained it away in my mind because I thought you were done with him.” I run a hand roughly through my hair. She keeps trying to interject but I refuse to let her get a word in. “All this time, I thought he was abusing you because you didn’t have much choice. I thought you werehelpless. I thought you were confused. I figured I could help you because…” The words are caught in my throat. And I don’t think she deserves to hear them.
“I feel the same way?—”
“No you don’t!” I boom. She flinches. I don’t like being this way. This is not who I am. I need time to process my anger, andshecan’t be there when I do. “I’m not going to be your dirty little secret while you marry that sociopath.” I do my best to keep my tone measured. “I’m going to sit here, and you’re going to go into that room, change your clothes and leave.”
“But Lucian…”
I give her a glare. “Eden, just leave. Please.”
She stands there for longer than I’d like. Long enough that I start to reconsider my decision. Last night, she came apart in my hands. It was better than anything I could’ve imagined, anything I’d ever experienced.
And it wasn’t even about the sex. It was how it felt like we were two pieces of the same whole. Talking to her lights up my soul—like she’s cracked open a part of me that lets light in for the first time. There’s nothing I want more than to be able to make her happy, to give her the life she deserves, toprotecther. But I can’t protect someone who doesn’t want to be protected.
Maybe I could be her dirty little secret—if only to keep her safe.
The thought surprises me but I push it out of my head quickly. That would only put her in more danger in the long run. I don’t want to be hidden, either. When Eden realizes that I am unyielding, she mopes to the bedroom. I put my head in my bruised and bloody hands.
I’m so angry.
I’m fucking tired of this place, of this bullshit, of these games, ofeverything.
If Eden wants to marry Silas, then she can. I’m just going to make sure she knows exactly who she’s marrying—and what the consequences will be. I’ve played nice with everyone here for too long. They’ve forgotten who I am.
It’s time I take things into my own hands.
I’m LucianAugustine-Beaumont.
And when I’m done, Augustine Diocesan Academy will be nothing butashes.
VII
EDEN
Ican’t feel my legs.
I’m walking—maybe floating—but I can’t feel myself moving. My hands are cold, my chest tight, and my heart…
It’s hammering in a way that doesn’t even feel real.
None of it feels real.
I’m caught in a cruel loop. Lucian’s angry voice keeps repeating itself in my head, each time more accusatory than the last. He was seething, and even though he had obviously just been in a fight, he looked more broken on the inside than out.
His words cut me like glass.
And the worst part—I deserved it.
I try to blink away the tears, but they come faster than I can catch them. They streak down my face, hot and humiliating. I wish I could cut open my body and show Lucian how I really felt, how I didn’t mean to hurt him. How I hid my engagement because I was unsure if I wanted to marry Silas anymore after how honest we were with each other.
