Page 59 of Accidentally Forever
“I’m just tired. And we finished our major project last week. I’ve been dealing with permits and contracts all day, so I took the afternoon off.”
I blinked. “You don’t take time off. You are worse than your uncle Wes like that.”
“Uncle Wes takes time off because Aunt Jillian makes him. But you’re right, I don’t take time off. Maybe I should go on vacation. See the sights. Put down the hammer. Do something for myself.”
“Now you’re starting to worry me.”
“It’s nothing.”
“It’s something.”
“Gia is getting married.”
It took me a moment to realize who Gia was, and I blinked. “Your ex? That didn’t take long.”
“Tell me about it. She found the love of her life, andapparently breaking up with me to do so was the perfect catalyst.”
“You don’t still love her, do you?” I asked carefully.
“I don’t. Which is probably an issue all on its own. I just had a bad morning, and might’ve yelled at somebody, so I’m taking the afternoon off.”
“Do you want to get out to do something?”
He shook his head. “No. I’m here because I want to make sure that you’re okay. That my cousin is safe. Whatever is going on with Travis scares the hell out of me.”
“You’re not alone there.” I paused. “You matter, you know. And we both know I hate talking about my feelings. So stop making me talk about my feelings.”
His lips twitched. “You are so enlightened it’s hard for me to even breathe. However, since we are talking about feelings, do you want to talk about what the hell is going on with my cousin? As in, what are your intentions? Because I’m in the mood to be nosy.”
I gave him a look, barely resisting the growl escaping my lips. “Not sure how that’s your business.”
“Again, I’m a Montgomery. I don’t know why you’re so surprised about this fact. But stop being an idiot and talk to me. Or maybe, this is going to be a surprise, maybe you should talk to her about, oh I don’t know, your feelings for fuck’s sake.”
I blinked at the raised tone and shook my head. “Why are you suddenly worried that I’m not?”
“Because you’ve been in love with her for years and you never did a thing about it. You watched her circle the drain while trying to help Travis, and you were always there to pick up the pieces. I was wrong. I thought that she loved him. But that wasn’t the case. She wasn’t in love with Travis. She wanted to help him because apparently, she has a savior complex. Much like we all do in this damn family. But every single time she fell right along with Travis, picking him up, you were there too. Picking up her pieces. So, for the love of the gods, just tell her you love her and stop worrying that she’s going to run away. She loves you. We can all see it.”
“You thought she loved Travis. So why the hell do you think she loves me?” I snapped. I hadn’t even realized the words were there until they were already out of my lips. But it was the truth.
I had thought she had loved Travis in some way this whole time, and I had been wrong. So who was to say that she loved me? Maybe this was all in my damn head.
“It’s different. And don’t tell me how I know, I just do. But I hate the two of you dancing around each other for so long. And I know you, Crew. You’re going to put her first, and in doing so, you might let her walk awayto protect you both.”
“What the hell are you talking about? We’ve barely started even dating.”
“You’re not telling her about this. I can see the way your mind works. You’re thinking that if you worked with her, maybe Travis will stay away. Maybe she won’t feel so insecure about you. But if you push her away to protect her, she’s never going to forgive you. We both know that.”
“You have no idea what you’re saying.”
Although, I knew that was a lie. I hadn’t even realized that’s where my thoughts had been going until he put it out there.
I rubbed my hand over my chest and set down my notes. “How did you know I loved her?”
“It’s written all over your face, man. I’m surprised she hasn’t figured it out. Or frankly, I’m surprised you haven’t.”
“We both know I figured it out a long time ago,” I muttered, looking at the canvas, wondering if I was ever going to finish this.
It wasn’t that it was a bad piece. I was just holding back. Each stroke felt as if I were ripping it from my soul, and the shades weren’t aligning, the focus not quite there. Because if I put what I wanted to on the canvas, she was going to see everything.
