Page 53 of Accidentally Forever
Chapter Eleven
Crew
The scent of coffee woke me up. That bold flavor from one of my favorite beans that I had recently bought hit my nostrils, and my eyelids popped open. I reached toward the other side of the bed and frowned when I realized it was empty. It was still warm, so Aria must have been there recently, but I didn’t like waking up without her next to me.
I rolled to my back, ignoring my morning wood, and the fact that it was currently tenting the sheets, and thought back to that idea.
Since when had it become normal? Routine that Aria would be by my side?
It hadn’t been like this before. Not when we’d hate fucked and I’d hidden my feelings from the both of us. When we’d been sneaking around from the rest of ourfriends, acting as if we weren’t on a precipice of inevitable failure. Only now it felt as if we slept at each other’s house every evening. Not having Aria cradled in my arms, that rounded backside of hers pressed against my cock in the morning, felt wrong.
I liked waking her up by slowly sliding my cock between her legs, waking her up with pressure at her entrance, and letting her take charge by sinking down onto me. Letting her be the one to say yes. I loved that moment when I would slowly open my eyes and realize that I had palmed her breasts, her nipple pressing against my hand. I knew I played with it in my sleep, and sometimes she would wrap her hand around the base of my cock, rubbing me as she dreamed.
In other words, we always had our hands on each other. It was starting to scare me how much I wanted this.
I didn’t have a reference for whatever the two of us were. Despite having so many friends who fell into serious relationships, I’d never had one. Daisy had been the closest, and it really wasn’t even close to anything like what I had with Aria. I tried dating after Daisy and I had broken up, perhaps feeling like Iwasthat character fromFrozen, feeling not enough. Or maybe that was just what the Montgomerys had placed on me with their constant jokes about me kissing my way throughthe family to find my way in. I knew they were only joking, but sometimes I didn’t truly believe it. However, there might be some truth to it.
The Montgomerys were the family I didn’t have. That steadfast connection that I hadn’t been allowed to even contemplate before leaving the family that had tried to destroy me and becoming friends with the people who truly cared.
They had that foundation that held rock-steady even in the face of terror and loss.
And I didn’t have that. Hell, I was still having to deal with my father—a man who hated me even when his disease forced him to never remember me or his own reality. All because of a displaced sense of loyalty to the blood running in my veins. I didn’t want to be in debt to the McTavish name but the person in me who had begged for their acceptance still held on even in denial.
My mother wouldn’t even look at her husband but took out all her fear on me. It made no damn sense. Though I suppose it made perfect sense when I thought about the way my family operated.
And yet in this moment, I was disappointed that Aria wasn’t tucked into my side when I woke up. And not just because I wanted to slide inside her and feel her around every inch of me. I just wanted to be by her. And that terrified me more than anything.
Because what would happen next? When would she realize that we weren’t endgame?
I didn’t even know if I had endgame in me.
And how utterly pointless and demoralizing was that idea?
I finally pulled myself out of bed since the scent of coffee had grown stronger. I shoved on the jeans I had tossed off the night before, not bothering to button them. I went into the adjoining bathroom, brushed my teeth, took care of business, and headed down to the kitchen.
The sight of Aria in my kitchen wearing my T-shirt and nothing else as she danced to whatever music was playing on her ear buds nearly took my breath away. She had piled her hair on the top of her head with a clip, and she rolled her ass back and forth as she cooked breakfast on my chef’s grade stove.
Every time she would move however, the shirt would ride up slightly, and I could see a peek of the globes of her ass. I wanted to bend her over right there and slide my cock in between those cheeks, taking my fill of her and making sure she came around me.
I was a freaking monster.
A horny monster.
I padded my way into the kitchen, the idea of coffee and the draw of Aria herself too strong. I went to turn off the music on her phone, so shewould be able to hear me coming up to her since she was near an open flame, and frowned as I looked down at the screen.
Travis:
Why aren’t you answering?
Travis:
Fucking whore.
Travis:
I’m going to end you.
Travis:
