Page 43 of Flirting With Forever
A rough laugh emerged from her, the ache in his chest growing at the heartbreaking sound.
She drew back far enough to look at him.
“I have no control over my life, and I desperately want it,” she whispered, her words choked as she struggled to voice them. “And you are so obsessed with controlling everything…you’re drowning. You want to take on more and more and more—including me.”
He smiled ruefully at the words and brushed her hair back from her face. “Only because it’s you. So let’s compromise. You stick around and help me loosen the reins a bit by proving what a powerhouse you are, and I’ll prove to you I’ll do whatever I can to keep you safe. Even,” he said, interrupting her when she opened her mouth as if to protest, “if it’s just listening and talking over a plan to handle whatever it is you’re so afraid of. Deal?”
He waited, barely breathing, searching her face as she stared up at him, battling internally, because he could practically see the wheels churning in her beautiful head.
But then, finally, she nodded.
“You’ll stay?”
She didn’t want to say it. He could tell. But she nodded again.
“For now. But you should know, I’m not going to sleep with you. I don’t do casual.”
He laughed softly, caught off guard by her bluntness, then bussed a kiss over her perfect lips. “Maybe I’m fighting so hard because I don’t want casual, Merida.”
The storm wasn’t over after all.
Because after agreeing to stay for now, a storm raged inside Sloane and buffeted her like a hurricane-tossed sea.
By mutual agreement, she and Gage had headed into the dark house. Once inside, they stood awkwardly at the base of the stairs, but when she turned to go to her room, he snagged her elbow in a gentle grip once more and tilted his head toward the space above. “It’s been a long day, and I know you need some sleep, but I’d feel better if you stayed upstairs.”
She smirked. “Afraid I’ll change my mind and leave?”
“Yeah,” he said, “I am. So, humor me and come up?”
She obviously wasn’t going to get out of the conversation he was so determined to have, and she knew it. And until she acquiesced, he was apparently going to keep close tabs. “I’ll grab some clothes and meet you up there.”
She used a small flashlight to head into her room and get what she needed, but when she emerged, Gage waited in the same spot as before, no doubt making sure she followed through and kept to the plan.
He really was a control freak, she mused, the thought bringing a small smile to her lips. But now knowing his story and how he and his brothers and sister had grown up so very different from her, she understood why he felt like he had to be financially stable, no matter how hard he had to work. Trauma was trauma. It emerged in numerous ways, and for Gage, it was knowing if one income source failed, he had others. Could create more to an obsessive extent.
That need, that drive and determination, was both sad and inspiring.
Silent, they made their way upstairs. She went into the spare bathroom to shower like she had after being injured, but once inside, she found herself staring into the mirror above the sink.
She did look tired, but it wasn’t from last night or the work today. She was the kind of tired that came from stress and worry and fear. The kind that anchored deep and created the shadows in her eyes and beneath them and gave her an appearance she didn’t like seeing, much less feeling.
She’d told Gage she would stay. For now. But was it too risky? Maybe it would be fine?
After the last few times Noah had been sent to force her back to Chicago, maybe they’d all finally understand that she just wanted to live her life. Be free of them. Free them of her. Live and let live.
Could it be that easy? That simple? Was she running from shadows?
She hated being so uncertain. Hated the desire she felt for peace and security and—Gage.
Her feelings for him had grown from reluctant friendship to more. Not love. Not yet. But…the hopeful possibility of a home and a life and…a man. A friend. A steady someone who might become more in time.
“Maybe I’m fighting so hard because I don’t want casual, Merida.”
She closed her eyes and took a shuddering breath, leaning her head back on her neck as she called out to God to fix the mess she was in. To make it so that she no longer had to run.
Because otherwise?
How temporary could she really keep this without losing her heart completely?
