Page 30 of Taken By the Soldier
I wince when my punished bottom hits the water, but the sting gradually fades, and I start to enjoy myself. A moan drifts from my throat and I sink deeper into the warm bath. The water instantly eases my sore muscles.
Luka joins me in the tub and gathers me close. I don’t resist. I go willingly into his arms and seek comfort in his embrace.
“I haven’t taken a bath in ages,” I murmur sleepily. “The water in my apartment building was still working, but it was cold and I only took quick showers. I had a sonic shower installed, too, but of course it wouldn’t work without electricity. This is… nice.”
He doesn’t reply and I sense he’s deep in thought. A glance up into his stark blue eyes confirms it. I almost ask what he’s thinking about, but then I think better of it and press my lips together and settle deeper into his arms.
Chapter16
LUKA
Tonight,the settlement is blanketed in darkness. A cloud cover blocks out the moon and stars, but it’s not raining. As I aim my flashlight at the path ahead, my eyes dart around the forest. It’s instinctual, this urge to constantly search for danger.
Sometimes I’m disappointed when I don’t find it.
It’s been this way ever since I set foot on American soil, and I can’t help but wonder if this obsessive need to be hyper-aware of my surroundings will ever leave.
Maybe it’s ingrained in me now, part of my goddamn charming personality.
My legs ache from a day spent training hard with my men. We practiced assembling weapons, target shooting, and physical combat, all of this followed by a ten-mile run in the mountainous terrain. The war might be winding down, but it’s still my job to keep my men combat ready. Just as it’s my responsibility to lead this settlement. I take my duties seriously and refuse to shirk them even on the days I’m tired and would like nothing better than to remain home with Judith.
Thoughts of my new wife fill me with conflicting feelings. We’ve been married for two weeks now, and I still haven’t let her out of the house. I haven’t even taken her for a walk. I’ve been too nervous that she’ll curse publicly or misbehave in some manner.
Eventually, I will have to take a leap and trust her. I know I can’t keep her locked up forever, and a few of my men have inquired about her well-being. Gunnar and Forrest, in particular, won’t stop asking about her, both of them claiming their wives would love to have her over for a visit. If Judith isn’t seen in the settlement soon, people will start to talk, and I fucking hate gossip.
The path opens into a clearing, and the lights from the nearby houses illuminate the night just enough that I can turn my flashlight off. I shove it into my pocket and check my wrist comm just to make sure I don’t have any urgent messages. When I determine nothing needs my immediate attention, I hasten my steps and hurry toward home.
I pause in front of my cabin when I notice Judith standing in the kitchen window. At first, I think she’s talking to someone, but then I realize she’s singing. The window is closed, so I can’t hear her, but she’s definitely singing as she prepares dinner. Her expression is so carefree that she looks like a stranger to me. I’ve never seen her appear so happy.
I watch her for far too long. I’ve never heard her sing before, and I suspect once she hears me walk inside, she’ll fall silent. I don’t want to take this bit of happiness away from her, so I linger on the porch and eventually sit down on the steps. The clouds move enough that several stars materialize in the dark sky. Eventually, I’m able to pick out the Big Dipper.
When I hear voices and footsteps approaching from the docks, I finally rise to my feet, turn off the alarm using my wrist comm, and enter the cabin. I’m too mentally exhausted to talk to another person today. Not counting my wife, that is.
The smell of spaghetti greets me as I approach the kitchen, and so does a melodious voice. Judith didn’t hear me enter the cabin and she’s still singing. I don’t recognize the tune, but as I listen to the lyrics, I realize it’s an upbeat song about falling in love.
Jesus.
I find myself standing in the doorway, torn between clearing my throat to casually announce my presence or simply calling out a greeting.
A memory crashes over me and suddenly it’s difficult to breathe.
Isabell and I used to sing together while driving in our solar car. In between laughter, we would take turns belting out the lyrics to our favorite songs. Neither of us could carry a tune, yet we’d had fun singing off key.
How long has it been since I laughed? Since I even hummed a tune under my breath? A long fucking time. Since before the war started, that’s for sure.
Sometimes I don’t recognize myself anymore. The bombs dropped on the Zasforr Islands and I became a new person.
A widower hardened by grief and the consuming need for revenge.
Some of my memories surrounding the days after the bombs dropped are hazy. I’ll see flashes in my mind on occasion—violent images of killing American soldiers in hand-to-hand combat during covert missions.
As I watch Judith sing and dance around the kitchen, I remember the enemy soldiers I choked and stabbed to death. The throats I slit. The skulls I bashed in. I took so many lives and I’d enjoyed every second of it. I’d reveled in the bloodshed.
But at some point, I grew tired of killing. I started longing for peace and quiet. For healing. If healing is even possible. Maybe it’s not.
Judith turns and our eyes lock, and she shrieks as the plate of brownies she’s holding flies up in the air. I lurch forward just in time to catch the plate and the brownies. She places a hand to her chest, breathing hard as she shoots me an indignant look.
“How long have you been standing there, Luka?” Her eyes widen and her face grows pink.
