Page 21 of Orange Spell
“You’ve been moping for weeks.Since the party, actually.Did something happen then?”
“I said I’m fine.”
“And that’s clearly a lie.You can tell me, or you can tell Birch, but you have to stop keeping it to yourself before it drives Birch nuts.”
Marlin looked around.It was the middle of the afternoon, so it was too late for the lunch rush and too early for dinner.The dining hall wasn’t empty, but it was as close to empty as it ever got, except during the night.If Marlin wanted to talk to Aaron, this was the perfect time.“I shouldn’t tell you.I don’t want you to have to keep secrets from Birch, and I’m not ready to talk to him.”
Aaron frowned.“I can promise not to tell him anything.”
“I don’t want you to keep secrets from him.”
“I wouldn’t be.This isn’t my secret, and we both know Birch would understand.At the same time, I’d be able to assure him that you’re okay.He’s worried.”
Marlin sighed.“Fine.You can’t tell him anything, though.”
“I won’t.”
“The night of the party, I didn’t go home by myself.I spent the night with Curran.He was gone by the time I woke up, so clearly, it meant something different for me than it did for him.That’s why I’m like this.I thought that night meant that he wanted me as much as I want him, but he doesn’t, and that’s fine.I’ll get over it.”
Initially, Aaron didn’t say anything, which made Birch uncomfortable.He wanted to ask him to say something, but he was also afraid of what would come out of Aaron’s mouth.
“This is where you tell me I fucked up,” he said.
Aaron shook his head.“I don’t see why I should.You and Curran are adults.If you both wanted it, I see nothing fucked up about the situation.”
“Do you think Birch will see things the same way?”
“He knows both of you.I don’t think he’d be surprised to learn it happened.”
That made Marlin frown.He’d been careful not to show anyone how he felt about Curran.He hadn’t wanted to make Curran uncomfortable or fight with Birch.As much as they loved each other, he wasn’t sure Birch would feel that he was good enough for Curran.
“So Curran’s refusing to talk to you?”Aaron asked.
Marlin rubbed his hands around his cup of coffee.It had gone cold, and he wasn’t planning on drinking it, but it gave him something to hold onto.“I wouldn’t say refusing as much as avoiding.I swear that every time we’re in the same room, he runs.”
“You could visit him at home.”
“But then he might feel cornered.I’m sure he has good reasons for not talking to me.Maybe he thinks this will be less awkward.”
Aaron snorted.“Sure he does.Can you imagine what the next holidays will be like?”
They usually celebrated together.Sometimes, Marlin spent the holidays with his parents, and other times, he spent them with Birch and his family.Having grown up together, they were like brothers, so it made sense.
“It’s a while yet until the holidays.I’m sure we’ll be fine and that I’ll be over all of this by the time they come.”
The way Aaron kept staring at him made Marlin uncomfortable, but he was afraid to ask what was going on in Aaron’s mind.The man was smart and still a bit of an outsider.He had a different perspective.“You think I should talk to him?”
Aaron nodded.“Definitely.If anything, you need to clear things up so that you’re not uncomfortable.Whether you like it or not, you and Curran are in each other’s lives to stay.Unless one of you gives up on Birch, and I really hope you won’t, you don’t have a choice.I think that Curran might surprise you, though.I don’t know what happened that night, but I don’t have to.No one has to, except the two of you.”
“I just don’t want to force him into something he doesn’t want.”
“You’ll have to see him eventually.Do you want to wait until things are as awkward as possible, or would you rather solve this head-on?”
He wasn’t wrong.Marlin might not want to push Curran, but eventually, theywouldhave to talk.Wouldn’t it be better to do it now, before things got even more awkward?That way, they wouldn’t have to involve Birch.“I’ll think about it.”
Marlin wasn’t sure he’d succeed, but hewasgoing to try.
