Page 124 of Every Bit As Perfect
“Explain to me what you mean.”
“All right,” I began slowly.“You and Dad doubt every idea I’ve ever had.”
“Go on.”
“I wasn’t an official member of the swim team because I didn’t meet the aesthetics.”
“I remember that.”Her lips tightened.
“The boys only wanted me to get to Noelle.”
“Yes.That was a problem,” she acknowledged.
“Paul was constantly on me to exercise.Then tells me he doesn’t believe in marriage only to turn around and get engaged within a few months.”
This time her lips pressed so tightly together, they formed a flat, white line.
“And Noelle, Hawk, and Max hid the fact that Daire asked her out first.And I feel like they couldn’t believe a man like him could be interested in a girl like me.”I paused.“Though I might be wrong about that last bit.”
“Is there anything else?”
I threw up my arms.“That’s it!”
She sat quietly; her chin angled downward.
“Aren’t you going to say anything?”
“I’m thinking,” she murmured.“Give me a minute.”
We sat staring at each other across my desk.
Finally, she tilted her head.“You’re right about Dad and me.We doubted you.A lot.”
Hearing her confirm that crushed me and validated me both.
“The rest of the stuff, being second best, being passed over by the boys, those things happened in your formative years.And honey, that shit sticks.I hate to say this, but Paul is a prick.More than once, I’ve had to hold your father back.Never mind the teeth marks on my own tongue.”
“Ugh,” I grunted.The fact my parents knew how he treated me made it somehow worse.
“There’s this crazy, somewhat dysfunctional institution called a family where everybody plays a different role.And I think sometimes we get stuck in those roles.Living in a small town works much the same way.But, I wonder, do you think the only one who sees you the way you’re describing is you?”
“Oh, you think I’m imagining it?”
“No, but I think things have changed over the past decade, and maybe you just haven’t caught up.For example, Dad and I are ready to hand over the reins to you within the next couple of years.We were going to start talking to you about it in the new year.We don’t want to force it on you, but we’re ready to retire.And you’re more than ready to take it over if you want it.”
My mouth fell open.
“We’re naturally more cautious than you are.At first, granted, we didn’t know if you could handle the extra projects you wanted to take on.But you’ve proven yourself more than capable again and again.I’m so sorry we did not communicate that to you sooner.”
“I want it.”
She offered a tiny smile.“Well, okay then.It’s yours.What other roles do you think you’re stuck in?”
“What do you mean?”The way she looked at me made me squirm.
“What other roles are you hanging onto?Bench-warmer?Bratty little sister?Grieving sister?Second best?”
“All of the above,” I admitted.
