Page 23 of Hide and Sneak
“Don’t answer me right now. Think about it. I know how you feel. We’re both super independent and always have been, but that doesn’t mean we can’t accept something for nothing when it falls in our lap. Besides, you would’ve gotten a mortgage and everything next year. We’re helping you speed things up a little, that’s all.”
I hug her again. “I’ll think about it. Please tell Cooper thank you for me too. I don’t want either of you to think I’m not grateful if I don’t take it.”
“Of course we wouldn’t. I know there’s a lot more to it. Quitting your job you’ve been at forever is a big leap.” Her phone rings and she’s quick to answer it. Her grin makes it clear that it’s Cooper. She’s so in love, it’s amazing to see. After watching her go through some of the worst men possible, I’m thrilled she found a good one.
“Yes, I showed her around. She’s going to think about it.” She pauses for a minute. “Hang on.” She looks over at me. “He wants to talk to you. Is it okay if I put him on speaker?”
“Sure.”
“Lila, don’t make me come down there,” Cooper says immediately, making us both laugh.
“You’re crazy and so is your wife. You can’t give me a building.”
“Take it or it’ll sit empty like it has for the last five years.”
“I really appreciate it. More than I can ever say, but I have to think about it. Maybe I could…rent it from you for a while.” If I’m staying here, I won’t have my trailer rent to pay.
“Maren, baby, work on her. I have to go. See you tonight.”
Once she hangs up, she has to go too and I spend a few minutes sitting in my car trying to digest what just happened.
My mind is still stuffed with too many thoughts when I return home to find Sutton sitting on the couch. His legs are spread and an ice pack rests in the crotch of his pants. “Did you talk shit to the wrong woman or did you go back for seconds from the wasps?”
“Neither. I had surgery. You should feel very sorry for me and bring me a glass of iced tea.”
“Surgery? Seriously?” He drove himself to and from a surgery? The most likely scenario strikes me. “Are you talking about a vasectomy?”
“I never want to hear that word again,” he says, shifting with a wince. Men are such babies.
“Didn’t they give you one of those cones to put around your head?”
“No, but I might need a sponge bath later.”
I grab myself a bottle of water and bring him a glass of tea. “Here, consider this a thank you from all womankind for taking yourself out of the gene pool. Excellent choice.”
“It’s a shame not to pass on my superior brain and god level body, I know, but I don’t want kids.”
“Because you are one?” I tease, sitting across from him.
His lips curl up. “You’re in a good mood. Did you hit a man with your car on the way home or something?”
“Nah, they’ve learned to dodge me. How long is the recovery?” I’m hoping to have the trailer to myself to get some videos done. The same guy who asked for the marshmallow fluff wants a picture of my bare feet stepping in pudding. I’m not sure if he has a foot fetish or a food fetish but he pays well.
“I’m going back to work tomorrow.” He holds up a small prescription bottle. “They gave me the good stuff for tonight.”
“You got painkillers? And yet they will literally pull chunks out of a woman’s cervix without so much as a numbing cream. Men are spoiled.”
A look of horror crosses his face. “Is that true?”
“Yes, cervical biopsies, placing and removing IUDs. We don’t even get a piece of bark to bite on like the olden days.”
“That’s terrible. I’ve never been so glad to be a guy. I’ll be back to normal in a week. Then it’s just a follow up appointment to make sure I’m shooting blanks.”
Dusty trots into the room, excited to see us. He goes back and forth, not sure who he wants to pet him more. When Sutton reaches down to scratch behind his ears, Dusty grabs the ice pack from between his legs and darts down the hall.
The bathroom door is closed so he can’t toss it in the toilet. “Don’t chase him. It’s what he wants and we’ll never break the behavior,” I warn. Keeping my voice firm, I call his name and snap my fingers. Once he figures out we aren’t coming after him, he reluctantly brings the ice pack back, dropping it on the floor beside me. He then retreats to Sutton again.
“Dirty trick, buddy.” He smirks as Dusty’s doggy grin wins him over. “What’s the opposite of a service animal? You’re a disservice dog.”
