Page 47 of Tucker
“Yeah,and the two picnic tables are finished as well. You’ll have to send the boxtruck after them though.”
“I’llget Dexter to go out there tomorrow to pick them up,” she assures me. A smileappears on her weathered face. “What happened to that girl you were seeing?”
Herewe go. Mona seems to take it as a personal affront that I’m single. “I wasn’tseeing anyone. All the good ones are taken. Like you,” I tease.
Sheflaps her hand at me. “You know who I mean. The one you were babysitting.”
“Mydays of babysitting are over.”
“That’sa shame,” she says, writing me a check for this week’s products. “You need agood woman.” When I reach for the check, she holds onto it and her eyes stareinto mine. It feels like I’m looking into years of wisdom while she says,“Happiness doesn’t come knocking on your door, you know. You have to hunt itdown and make it yours.”
“I’llremember that,” I tell her.
Herwords replay in my head as I sit in my truck. The thought of going back to thatempty farmhouse sounds like the most depressing prospect imaginable. There aredays when I’m pissed at Leah for no good reason. Before she came, I wasperfectly content to live alone, to pass the days with no other voices in myear. Now, there’s a Leah shaped void everywhere I look.
Iwant to hear her singing in the kitchen while she cooks and hear her typingwhile I watch TV. I want to tell her about the new contracts I’ve gotten andhear about her books. I want to listen to her babble on about everything andnothing.
WhenI start my truck and pull out of the parking lot, it seems to have a mind ofits own as it makes a left toward the highway, away from my house. Some ofLeah’s impulsivity must have rubbed off on me because I’m going to find her.
Duringthe ride, I almost change my mind a hundred times. This is stupid. I shouldcall first. She may not even be home. It’s a Friday night, after all. But Ican’t talk myself out of it. I need to see her, even if it’s just for a fewminutes, although I have every intention of bringing her home with me, over myshoulder if I must.
It’sjust started to get dark when I park across the street from Leah’s new place.Her porch light flicks on, and for a second, I think maybe she saw me pull up,though I’m a couple of houses down from her. Some tool in a blue sedan parkedin front of her house as I turned onto her street.
Thelight isn’t for me. A thin red headed guy gets out of the car and heads up toLeah’s door, a bunch of flowers in his hand. The front door opens and she stepsout. Fuck, she’s beautiful. Her hair is shorter, barely brushing her shouldersand she’s wearing glasses. She never wore glasses.
Itoccurs to me how crazy this is. I’m assuming just because my life has beenstanding still, hers has as well. She’s moved on. I have no right to intrudeand steal the happiness she’s found.
Asick feeling settles in my stomach when he leans and drops a kiss on her lips.The same lips I kissed. The same lips that were all over my chest the night wefucked. The sharp pain quickly turns to anger, aimed at the guy kissing thewoman I love, and it’s everything I can do not to get out of the truck and riphim to shreds.
Ishould leave, but apparently I’m a glutton for punishment. I watch as he walksher to his car, and opens the passenger door. She’s all smiles as she getsinside. It’s her smile that makes the decision for me. I can’t do this to her.She’s happy.
Afterthey pull away, I start my truck and head back to the highway. It neveroccurred to me she’d be seeing someone. I guess I assumed Ayda would mentionthat when I ask about her. I’ve never asked the question though, so maybe sheknew I really didn’t want the answer.
* * * *
Thelittle girl giggles when I end up moving my cardboard child to a chute and haveto slide back to the beginning. I’m playing Chutes and Ladders with a five yearold. If Dare or one of the other guys walked in on this, I’d never live itdown.
I’mstaying with a woman and her young daughter in one of the safe houses for a fewdays, helping out Striking Back. It’s a holiday week and they’re short handed.It’s an easy assignment since there’s minimal risk the estranged husband willlocate them.
AlexReed is supposed to be here this evening to relieve me because it’s the Fourthof July and I’m being dragged to a get together at Landon’s for fireworkstonight. It’s not that I don’t want to hang out with them, the guys have madethe last two months far more bearable and I feel like I fit in somewhere forthe first time since I was in the service. No, the problem is a little blondewho still haunts my dreams.
Ihaven’t talked to Leah since the day of Kathi’s funeral. She called to check onme a few times, but I always let it go to voicemail, and she got the message.There was no point in dragging it out or leading her on to think we could betogether someday when I know she’s better off without me. She’s young andenthusiastic with all these plans for her life. I’m ten years older and all Ireally want to do is stay home and build stuff.
Granted,building stuff has been way more lucrative than I ever imagined. I have threedifferent furniture outlets buying from me now and I’ve even had to hire a guyto help me because I’m drowning in orders.
Icould quit Striking Back since I don’t need the money, but they need the help.I may not have the skills to help out the guys at In Safe Hands like I used to,but I can help here. Regardless, the guys still make it clear they consider mea part of ISH. They know if they do need help with anything outside of acomputer, I’m the guy to call.
Abig part of me wanted to pass on tonight’s little party, but I just couldn’t. Ican’t have her, but I couldn’t pass up a chance to see her. I’m a glutton forpunishment.
There’sa knock on the door and I’m instantly on my feet. “Go sit with your mom,” Itell the little girl, and she scampers away.
Myguard drops when I look through the peephole to see Parker and Alex Reed. “It’sjust my replacement,” I assure them before stepping outside.
“Hey,I was only expecting one of you. Did something happen? Has her husband beenspotted?”
Parkerglances at his brother. “No, I’m staying to guard them. Alex is going withyou.”
Confused,I turn to Alex. “I’m not supposed to be working tonight.”
