Page 15 of Justus
“Don’tworry. Myfiancéis a very brave man,” I say, fighting back a giggle.
Justusscowls at me, which means he isn’t watching the tech when he presses anot-so-small lubricated speculum inside him.
Thewhole table rocks violently as Justus nearly jumps off it. “What the fuck?”
“Justrelax,” the tech monotones, as if his reaction is perfectly normal. “The wateris going in now and we’ll massage your abdomen.”
Brightred creeps across his face, and he shoots me a panicked look.
“Youact like you’ve never had an enema before,” I giggle.
“Colonicirrigation,” the tech corrects.
“Idon’t care what the fuck you call it! Get that thing out of my ass!”
Witha long suffering sigh, the tech stops the flow of water. I swear his attitudeis making this one hundred percent funnier. “Are you sure you don’t want tocomplete the treatment?”
“Yes!”
“Okay,I’ll reverse the machine, but it will take a moment to remove the water andwaste from your colon. Please try to relax.”
Justusglares at me. “I can’t believe you signed us up for this.”
“Notus. Just you. I didn’t want to follow you around, you know, like a lost puppy.”
Aflash of humor registers in his eyes and he shakes his head. “Revenge is sweet,baby. Remember that.” His threat is overshadowed by the groan he lets out asthe water is released from his colon and pulled back through the tube. Justushisses as the tech pulls the speculum out, and I feel like my chest is going toburst from holding back the laughter. The look on his face! Priceless.
Thetech nods to me as he leaves the room, and I lean against the wall, laughing untilI think I might pee myself at the sight of Justus hobbling off to the bathroomwith his clothes.
* * * *
Mymother decides we should go out for dinner since she didn’t spend any time withme at the spa. We go to her favorite steakhouse, and I swallow a giggle whenJustus orders the biggest steak on the menu. “Hungry?” I tease.
“Starving.Apparently having a drain snake shoved up your—
“Justus!”I slam my hand over his mouth, but Mom cracks up.
“Ican’t believe you signed up for that. I’ve never been brave enough.”
“Ididn’t sign up.” He slips his arm around me. “Your lovely, smart ass of adaughter thought it’d be funny.”
Momlaughs even harder, and I point out, “Well, I wasn’t wrong.”
“Youtwo!” She wipes her eyes and sits back with a smile. “I swear, I hate toimagine what your kids will be like.”
“Whoa,back it up, Mom.”
Witha sigh, she gazes off into the distance. “They’d be beautiful.”
“Mom,”I warn.
Anapologetic smile blooms on her face as she regards Justus. “I just want to knowshe’s not alone after I go.”
Aknot forms in my throat, but it’s Justus’s next move that brings tears to myeyes. He reaches across and places his hand over my mother’s. “She’ll never bealone. I promise you that.”
Momlooks him in the eye and whispers, “Thank you.”
“Butyou aren’t going to escape that soon. You have to be there to wrangle ourspawn. Coming from Sadie, you know they’re going to be stubborn.”
