Page 115 of Strings
“What are you laughing at?” Cherese asks. “She’s right, you know. He loves you. It’s written all over his face. I’ve seen it since day one.”
I roll my eyes. “You saw the lie. We were never really dating. We just let people think we were.”
Cherese shakes her head. “Duh. You think I didn’t know that?”
“What the fuck?” I question. “Did everyone know?”
Bella nods.
“You didn’t act like it. The first day you showed up and fainted? He was as shocked to see you as you were to see him. I don’t know why you all thought you were such good actors. Don’t give up your day jobs.”
“I can’t believe you knew. Why didn’t you say something?”
“Because I saw the change. One day, you two were strangers, and then you were jealous. And then I saw him watching you when you weren’t looking.”
Bells sniffles. “Why couldn’t he ever look at me that way?”
“Shush. We covered you,” Cherese says sternly. Bella pouts. “We’re talking about Talia now.”
“Summer.”
“Whatever. The point is he’s a fucking mess. You’re a mess too, I can see it. You’ve been crying.”
I stare down at my hands and pick at my fingernails.
“I saw him here today with his cleaning crew. He was downright broken. Do you know how much all of this must have cost him?”
“He feels sorry for me.”
Cherese shakes her head. Bella leans her head on Cherese’s shoulder and Cherese pushes her off. “Men don’t do shit because they feel bad. If he felt bad, he would have sent flowers. This isn’t ‘I feel bad.’ This is ‘I fucking love you but you’re too dumb to see it.’ A man only does what he wants to do. He wants to do you. You need to get your man, sis. Don’t let him get away. He’s a good one.”
I let go of Bella and stand. She slumps to the side, resting on my pillow. “You don’t understand.”
“Do you want him?” she asks.
I shrug.
“Do you have any chocolate? I need something.”
Cherese walks over to the kitchen and opens the fridge. “Ooh, he set you up.” She opens a pudding cup and walks back over to me. “I’m going to ask you again. Do you want him?”
I swallow hard. “Yes. I really do.”
“Then tell him.”
As Cherese licks the lid of her cup, I think about what she said. Have I been reading him wrong? But she doesn’t know what I’ve done. If she did, maybe she’d know he couldn’t possibly love me. Could he? Am I going to be scared my whole life? He said I had a blank slate. What am I going to write on it? Summer Winters ran from everything. Maybe Talia Pearson doesn’t run. Maybe she stays. Maybe she fights. Maybe she wins.
You can’t win the game if you don’t play.
After Cherese helped me get Bella back to her apartment, I fell fast asleep on my brand new bed. I wake up with a clear head, ready to face the day and everything that comes with it. Even though the Gala doesn’t start until this evening, I have a full day planned. I make sure I take my letter of resignation with me, along with the other letter I wrote. That one may come as a surprise, but it’s been a long time coming.
I pack up my dress and make my way downstairs. Amy is waiting with a big smile. I’m so thankful for her. I’m thankful for Cherese, too. Everyone needs a friend who doesn’t tell you what you want to hear, but rather what you need to.Friends. Is this what I’ve been missing my whole life?
Amy and I rush around the Gala, getting everything set up for the event. It’s almost six when I finally change into the dress Sebastian bought for me. It fits me like it was made for me. I’ve never felt so beautiful in my life. I hope he thinks so too.
I keep watching for him, but he hasn’t arrived yet. There’s so much I want to say. I check the time on my phone. My surprise is set to arrive at seven thirty. I have to make sure no one sees me. I’m afraid they’ll try to stop me, and nothing is getting in my way.
Guests start to arrive. Walking around the tables, I check to make sure everything is in its proper place. The evening’s itinerary catches my eye. Amy wouldn’t let me see it before, but she can’t stop me now. Appetizers begin at 7:00, followed by dinner and dessert. Next to 8:00 it says special guests. That’s all me. At 8:30 it says Principal Violinist for the Los Angeles Symphony, Sebastian Mikhail Corronov, accompanied by Dorlene McDermott, pianist. That’s it? Where’s the name of the song? Who’s Dorlene? Bordo is going to have my head. I shrug as I place the paper back on top of the plate. What do I care? I’m quitting anyway.
