Page 10 of Not A Homie, Lover Or Friend
The driver had finally arrived on the other side of town, where my hotel was located. It surprised me that the crew stayed in the uppity part of the city, since they all came from a city like theCove. Right then, I knew shit was changing.Was it me who had a one-track mind and didn’t want things to change?I didn’t know, but I did know that my money was running low and that my hotel stay was going to end soon.
My phone vibrated with a call from Foe. I declined the first call, and he began to call back-to-back, but I refused to answer because he’d waited until I left. When the car stopped, it alerted me that I had reached my destination, which wasn’t my hotel. I got out and entered the semi-full bar and grill.
I tried to rationalize my reasons for coming to Layoni’s, but I couldn’t think of one. I ordered the house drink as I sat glancing at everyone enjoying themselves. I pulled out my phone and scrolled through my social media. I went to Kirk’s page first. There he was, smiling as if his life was good, probably on the arm of another woman. I read the caption, and the nigga got hired at a different university. “What the fuck?” I mumbled.
I continued to scroll, landing on Monfua’s page as he had just posted a while ago of himself and his friends at the club. I rolled my eyes, then closed the app. My life was going to shit by the day, and as much as I thought I was pulling myself out of the whole, I only dug myself deeper into it.
There was a light tap on my shoulder before I heard Shaneice’s voice, “You're looking for my son?”
My head slowly turned her way as I smiled. “No, I came to have a drink.”
Honestly, I didn’t know if I wanted to see Monfua or not. I wanted to be in a place where I could clear my head before calling it a night because I was too ashamed to ask him to stay at his house. I knew he thought I was staying with my brother, and I had no way of trying to explain the lies. It should have been an easy decision to make, since he was my husband, but I couldn’t do it. The idea was to get drunk and sleep the night away.
Shaneice glanced at me curiously, “Well, I close in the next thirty minutes. I will be in the back. Any friend of my son is a friend of mine. Let me know if you need anything,” she said as she pointed at the chocolate man behind the bar. “Nate, you watch her. Not too much,” she finished and walked off.
I picked up my drink and sipped on it while I watched a couple rocked back and forth on the dance floor. They were an odd couple, but they looked cute together. He was definitely from the streets, and she looked like the girl next door.Looks like Harvey and Foe to me.“Tuh,” I mumbled as I finished the rest of my drink.
I quickly glanced at Nate, “Another one, please.”
When the guy smiled at her, his gold girl sparkled. I became lost in their love as I watched them interact. It was how I imagined Kirk and me would be, but we had nothing more than a sexual, toxic, and deceitful situationship. When the music stopped, she giggled loudly, “Pierre.”
I smiled, turned around, and guzzled down my drink before I requested another one. The bartenders didn’t make the house drink as good as Monfua, but they were doing something. The more I drank, the more I began to get in my feelings.
I was angry at love because it failed me. Love sent me on a spiral, it made me make a horrible decision that led me to Toussaint. Love didn’t conquer all; it destroyed things, sucked you up to a point that it made you blind, just as it did with my mother, Foe, and, clearly, Kirk and his intentions. I was over it all, and although Monfua said he wanted to try, I knew it couldn’t work because what he and I did wasn’t out of love, but rather out of wrong intentions.
MONFUA
After Beans and I got Mali home, I opted to go to the bar and grill because I was mentally tired. It wasn’t because of what happened at the club tonight, but the fact that the OGs didn’t respect us. Foe saying what he said had let me know what I had been feeling since the day Chevy busted into the house, pointing a gun at us.
To the guys, they thought I was saying the shit out of the side of my neck, but I knew what not being taken seriously looked like. I dealt with it with my father. Since leaving Samoa years ago, I’ve been trying to make amends with my dad, but my father felt like I was a lost cause. Now, don’t get me wrong, my father was raised with the older Samoan traditions, but the way he lived, he was still hood, or at least was. However, he was very serious about his traditions, his family, culture, and making something of yourself.
There was a time when he tried to teach me the language, introduce me to the culture, and even explain Siva Tau and its meaning, but back then, I wasn’t taking it all in. Now, I’ve been trying to capture it all. I wanted to show him that I could embrace the other part of me that runs through my veins. Iwanted to show him that I could do something he could be proud of. It was the reasons I decided to try to become a firefighter.
We had a cordial relationship. I made due with what I could get from him and kept it moving. I felt like he was still upset at my mother, not only for leaving him, but also for feeling as though she had turned me into a mama’s boy. He felt she had condoned the bad choices I made and placed a divide in my culture as if she didn’t want me to embrace the Samoan side, but he was wrong. I love my mother with everything in me, but I wasn’t a fucking mama’s boy.
At that time, I was young and naive, and I went where I felt I was most accepted. However, I was a different person now, and hopefully, soon he would see that. I was only minutes away from my place when my mother’s name popped up on my screen as I rode, so I answered it. “Hey, ma,” I called out.
“O fea oe?” she asked.
I loved it when my mother spoke Samoan. She knew what I had been trying to do, and her way of supporting me was to teach me the things that my father had taught her. “I’m on my way home. Why?”
The phone fell silent for a second before she came in. “That girl you brought here a while back. She’s here, she’s—”
My head flew back. “Sukalati?”
“Yes.”
She was just at the club not too long ago. I wasn’t sure of her reasons for going to the bar.Was she looking for me?“Is she ok?”
“Fua, come get her. I mean, I can take her to where she needs to go, but I’m a smart woman. I’m sure she would much rather see you.”
I passed up my street, then made a U-turn and headed downtown. I was curious why Lakia had gone to the bar in the first place. Also, I’d hoped she didn’t go running her mouthbecause I still hadn’t told my mother that we had eloped, and I knew once she found out, it would break her heart. It was one of the things she always talked about when I was young. She wanted to see me get married and have a family.
When I walked into the bar, Lakia was on the dance floor, slow rocking to no music.Oh, her ass is fried.I spotted my mother peeking from the back. I ran my hand down my face before I stepped over toward her. Lakia’s eyes squinted, her head fell to the side, and her arms stretched out to me. A smile eased on her face. “Fua,” she giggled.
Nobody called me Fua but my mother. However, her saying it made me feel good inside. I moved closer to her, taking her hand into mine. “Let me get you back to your brother’s.”
Lakia snatched her hand away from me. “No!” she spat as her eyes widened.
