Page 50 of Lusting for the Duke's Kiss
They kept walking, both lost in their memories. A full moon hung above them, illuminating their path. Hetty gazed up at it, remembering that night at Hillsworth House when Louis had been courting her, and they had sat outside, watching a moon, just like this one.
She had been so cautious of him, then, still so very hurt by all that had happened. Distrustful of him, and of everyone. It still sometimes amazed her that she was here, in his home, and that they were man and wife. That he had managed to break down her defences in the sweetest of ways. It had been a big job. Most men would have buckled beneath the weight of it.
She glanced at her husband. He was made of sterner stuff than that. Louis was tenacious, and he was patient. Besides, she hadn’t known at that point when they had sat side by side beneath the moonlight, that he had always been in love with her. That the memory of their one brief encounter had fuelled his life ever since.
Suddenly, they rounded a bend, and the small lake that lay to the east of the estate, was upon them. It was frozen over, now, looking like a glazed mirror in the moonlight. Without speaking, they headed towards it.
Hetty took a deep breath. It was so very beautiful. In summer, she knew that it would be teeming with birdlife. Now, in the darkness, it was silent, the birdlife gone to warmer climates. The trees that surrounded it looked like dark skeletons, with not a leaf on any of their branches. It was eerily lovely.
They sat down, side by side, staring at it. Hetty sighed deeply. While it was beautiful, it was also very cold. She didn’t think they would be out long this evening before the lure of the warm manor drew them back in like moths to a flame.
Louis fiddled in the bag, and suddenly, he pulled out two pairs of ice skates, holding them aloft, as proudly as a hunter that had just snagged a prize.
“Louis, no,” she breathed, her eyes widening. “It is too dark to go ice skating!” Her eyes drifted doubtfully towards the lake. “Besides, how do you know that the ice is hard enough to hold our weight? We could end up fighting for life in that frozen water when we fall straight through …”
He smiled a bit cheekily. “We will not fall through,” he said confidently. “Remember, I know this lake. I have skated upon it since I was young, not much older than Ben is now.” He paused. “And I have waited until the full moon, so we have enough light to guide us. Come on, Hetty. Or are you too scared?”
The challenge lay between them. She felt her heart beat faster as she gazed doubtfully at the lake. She wasn’t sure at all.
But then, she looked back at her husband. He wouldn’t put her at any risk. She trusted him, implicitly. And how much fun would it be to glide around the lake on skates underneath the moonlight?
She took a deep breath. “I am not too scared,” she said, smiling slowly.
His smile widened. “Come on, then. Let’s get these skates on and doit.”
***
He held her hand as they drifted around the lake. Hetty was hesitant, at first. It had been a long time since she had ice skated, and she still wasn’t entirely convinced that the ice was thick enough to hold their weight.
But after a while, she relaxed, letting him guide her around and around. It was as if they were slow dancing, the only music the soft sound of an owl hooting in the distance. His hand was cold, but firm, in her own. She knew that if she slipped, he would be there to hold her up.
After a while, she started to fall into a kind of trance. Their fogged breaths followed them like a trail of smoke. He twirled her around. Once. Twice. She staggered, a little, and he pulled her into his arms, enveloping her in his warmth.
They stayed like that for the longest time, the moon shedding its brilliance, upon them. He gazed down at her, suddenly solemn, frowning, just a little.
“Ben has accepted you,” he said, at last. “I told you it was only a matter of time before it happened.” He paused. “You are his mother now, Hetty. You will be the only mother that he will ever know.”
She blinked back tears. It was the first time that they had spoken of what had happened today. Of that magical moment when the little boy had called her his mother for the very first time.
She sighed deeply. “I love him as if he were my own,” she said, in a quiet, serious voice. “I love him as if I had carried him within my body and birthed him.” She hesitated. “I cannot understand, for the life of me, how his real mother could have abandoned him. How she could have made that decision, to leave his life forever.”
“She is not you,” he replied slowly. “She is not half the woman that you are, Hetty. That is how she made that decision.” He paused. “But it does not matter, any longer. He has you, now, and he will never know the lack of a mother, because of the woman that you are.”
She took a deep breath. “He is a very lucky boy to have you as a father,” she said, struggling now not to cry. “Any child would be lucky to have you as a father …” She shuddered suddenly, feeling the cold starting to permeate into her bones.
“Hetty, what is it?” he asked, tilting her chin higher with one hand.
She laughed self-consciously. “I did not wish to tell you yet,” she said in a trembling voice. “It is still early days, and I am not entirely confident …”
“Tell me what?” His voice sounded alarmed.
She took a deep breath, staring straight at him. “I think that I am with child,” she said, the breath leaving her body in a rush. “I think that I am having our child, Louis …”
He picked her up, abruptly, spinning her around, his eyes full of joy. And then, slowly, tenderly, he put her back down.
“You should have told me before,” he said, alarm in his voice. “I wouldn’t have made you skate like this. It is dangerous. If you fell …”
She laughed softly. “I know, my dearest. I thought of it myself.” She hesitated. “But I knew that you would not let me fall. It took me a long time to trust you, Louis, but now I do, implicitly. I would trust you with my life. You would never let any harm come to me or any of us. Ben, or the coming child …”
