Page 25 of A Duke's Wicked Secret
I know Georgina would wish me to tell her about this but for some reason, I am not ready to open up about this with anyone just yet. I just feel like it was such a perfect night that I could not bear it if she had anything negative to say about it.
It is crazy, I was with him less than twenty minutes ago and I already ache for him and his touch again.
Oh, if only I were his bride now, and we were on our honeymoon and could make love as often as we pleased and spend days on end together, that would be nothing short of heaven!
Honestly, marital relations are nothing like what Mamma told me to expect. I mean, of course, we are not married, but the act itself is so much more than Mamma led me to believe it would be.
She made it seem as though it would be something that I would have to endure so that I might have a child and produce an heir for my future husband and to ensure that he was pleased and not given a reason to look outside our marriage to have his needs met. That those relations would be a duty for me to fulfil much like I would be expected to keep order in the household. Not something that I would find great pleasure and passion in doing with my lover.
I wonder, does she see it this way because perhaps Papa is a ‘selfish lover’ as Theo put it? I feel so bad for her to have maybe never known what it is truly like to make love.
I know I should feel ashamed of myself for my actions, but I simply do not. There is nothing about my time with Theo that feels wrong or wicked in any regard and if I am being completely honest, I cannot wait to be in his bed again!
I think that is the bell ringing for breakfast and I am quite famished from last night’s activities so I must go for now.
Penelope closed her journal and hid it back in the bottom of her desk—where she always kept it under a bunch of the old needlework she had done when she was first learning how to as a little girl—and headed down for breakfast.
Chapter 10
Theo waited to see that Penelope was safely back home before leaving his spot on the hill, but instead of returning as he had planned, Theo decided to go to his favourite spot for an early breakfast. And then when it had opened, he stopped by the best florist in town and picked out a bouquet that he had delivered to the Ainsworth estate.
Theo did not write a note but specified that they were for Lady Ainsworth, and if anyone asked who the flowers were from, they were to say only that they were from a secret admirer of the lady.
After taking care of that and a couple of other small tasks requiring his attention, Theo made his way home. As he rode down the road, Theo’s mind was filled with the tempting images of Penelope last night. How good she looked this morning as she lay there on his bed sleeping peacefully …
He would have loved nothing more than to wake her up to the feeling of him inside her once more. Or even to get up while she slept and have tea and fruits prepared for her and then after they had enjoyed that in bed together to dive back under the covers again and stay there all day, making love to her and exploring every part of your beautiful body.
Theo eagerly looked forward to seeing Penelope at the opera tonight; even though he knew they would most likely only have a few moments alone together, his heart longed to be near her again.
Theo knew that he had to find a way to change Penelope’s father’s opinion of him, but he was unsure how to do so. Though Theo was certain whom to go to for that solution: Alexander. Alexander was always so much better at convincing people of his point of view and charming them without difficulty.
Theo found Alexander in the parlour reading the day’s paper.
“Alexander, do you mind if I intrude on your reading?”
“Of course, I do not mind at all, but I will tell you that I am leaving to call on Ms Georgina and take her berry picking in a few minutes,” answered Alexander.
“Oh, well, in that case, it can wait until later.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, it is nothing of great importance. Go, have a wonderful time, and send Ms Stuart my regards.” Before Alexander could ask him again what he wanted to discuss, Theo left the parlour.
Theo knew it was not his friend Alexander’s fault by any means, but his heart was pained to see how Alexander could call on Ms Stuart so freely. Why, if he wanted to, Alexander could propose to her today and marry her before the end of the season.
These were all things that Theo would love to have with Penelope, and he feared that it possibly could never happen, and if that were the case, he would be forced to let her go so that someone else could make her his bride and a mother. The mere thought of that sickened him and tortured his heart, but he would never stand in the way of Penelope taking her rightful place in society. He simply loved her more than that.
But Theo was not ready to consider that by any means. He would talk to Alexander soon, and he felt hopeful that the pair would be able to develop a plan to show the viscount that he was a worthy suitor for Penelope. Since Theo could not do anything else about this matter for the time being, he decided to try and focus on the work he needed to address in his study.
That afternoon, Alexander returned looking as though someone had just offered him all the jewels in the royal treasury. He walked around with that silly bashful grin, so evidently, a man lost in his love for the woman he was courting.
“Well, I take it from the spring in your step that you got all the berries you could ever desire today,” said Theo teasingly.
“Ahh, yes it was the best day! I mean it, Theo. I am mad about that woman. She is just truly perfect in every way.”
“I am very happy for you, Alexander. I think you have made a great choice in pursuing her,” Theo said.
“So tell me, what was it you wanted to discuss with me this morning before I left?”
